Writing

Same Thoughts Again and Again

2011-05-10T22:53:00.002+03:00

Can I unplug myself from the whole world and do what I want? But what do I want? Oh, I know, a little time for myself, just more time to accept everything, more time to take a deep breath and relax before I snap at whoever is there to listen. I don't need more time to know how I feel, I already know that, but won't you give me time to explain, time to understand, time to ask, time to forget. I'm not asking for time alone, did it sound like I wanted to be left alone? Perhaps I did, but I don't want to be left alone.... Hold on, i just said I know what I want, but I don't. And I just said I don't want to be left alone, but I do, and it's for your own sake. I just snapped at someone, it doesn't matter if they did anything wrong or not, I have a habit of blasting at people, and not just any people, only those who are close, because I know they'll take it from me, and I take advantage of that fact. So when I'm feeling down or depressed or even pissed, I prefer staying alone because it's not fair to give you a piece of my mind when you've done nothing wrong, and if you ask what's wrong, I won't be able to answer because I don't know what is wrong, so if I stay alone, you won't ask and I won't have to say I don't know, and I won't end up feeling guilty for letting it all out on you.
________
I fear you expect too much from me, I fear you take me for what I'm not, or is it that you know me better than I know myself most of the time?
I feel like you're punishing me for who I am, for what I think, for my flaws, for my weakness, for everything I'm not, I want to try and change whatever there is that needs to change, yet somewhere inside I'm perfectly comfortable the way I am, although I don't admit it that to anyone including myself, that's the reason I never even bother to try and change.
In the end, who am I referring to by 'you'? No one specific, at times 'you' referred to someone close, and at others it referred to people in general.

Ironic!

2011-04-29T00:37:00.003+03:00

Arabic tv channels are all willing to broadcast the royal wedding but how many are broadcasting what's happening in Libya, Syria, Yemen, and other countries?
Arabs are all tuned in to Barcelona and Real Madrid football matches, yet how many are watching the news? And what am I watching? Neither!

Distance

2011-04-26T00:00:00.002+03:00

Life knows how to put us in tough situations, we're very capable of doing that ourselves, but life has to put us in more. You move from one place to another and leave many behind. Others leave and leave you behind. Do we blame the distance for making us drift apart? Is it an excuse that we're too busy? Sometimes we do reach out but don't find enough encouragement therefore we stop reaching out. However we don't always reach out, it's always in the beginning when a friend leaves to another place that you and them talk, but after that something happens and you both lose every connection you had with each other. Weren't you close enough? Or have you found other friends who are there and got occupied with them? It's never the distance, it's just us preferring what's close to us, it's much easier this way. Perhaps that you've had your friend near you and then they leave and it's no longer satisfying just texting or chatting online. Those things suck every emotion of every word, or so it seems. But if you're attentive enough and you care then connections won't be lost.
However the previous points are not general rules, it depends on many things. What does it depend on? Not very important as long as all lead to people drifting apart, but again not all people. Some connections will never be lost because some are attentive enough and they care so distance is nothing to stop you from reaching out.
So what if life presents such a situation? All my life, it's been this way. And I think perhaps it's me that sometimes is to blame. I no longer get very close to people, because in the back of my mind, they'll leave and move to another place, or the very simple fact that this place where I am is not where I'm going to be.
But I'm here, the very fact that I wish I was there doesn't diminish the fact that I'm here and it doesn't mean that I won't reach out because I'm here, I'll reach out and expect disappointments but I cannot stop reaching out, I simply cannot. For those who've left and got busy with their lives, well I got busy with mine, and I'm to blame as much as they are.

A start

2011-04-25T22:40:00.004+03:00

I blame everything for everything. Also I'm very good at finding excuses, at least I'm convinced by them. I know I sound like I'm stating those things as facts but I'm aware now more than ever of this, therefore I'm trying my best to at least be self-conscious about it.
Life goes on and never gives you a break, what's new about that? When did it stop for us? When did it wait til we catch up? Perhaps I sound frustrated, but it's not the way I attend to sound anymore. If I didn't know that I tend to blame and find excuses for everything, then I'd go on doing it without noticing. But I know I'm like this, I've known it for a long time, yet did I do anything about it?
Will this wake up call only last me a few days and then I'll just forget about every plan I've made to reconnect and start to change myself for the better? Only time can answer that, but here and now is my start.

Voices

2010-07-14T23:30:00.006+03:00

-Lost?
-Yes.
-Afraid?
-N.. Yes!
-Confused?
-What?.. Yes?
-Focus with me, stop checking this or that!
-F.. Fine.
-Let's go back to the beginning. Lost, why?
-Lost touch with the inner world, I don't know whether I'm still the same or I've changed, and I sure don't know how to figure that out.
-Afraid of what?
-The unknown?
-That's too cliche, at least try to be honest!
-Ok ok! Afraid of myself, of what I know, of where I'm going to, of what's coming, of what's going, of everything and myself.
-So why are you doing this?
-To get out there, to put my mark and let it get lost in the world, knowing at least I'm trying to reach out and maybe find something.
-Find what exactly?
-Find anything, doesn't matter really. Just anything and feel less lost.
-And confused about what? Lemme guess of everything and yourself?
-I thought this was just what I have to say and you trying to be neutral, to try and help me.
-Well you thought wrong, I can't be neutral, I'm in and around you and within you, how can I be neutral when what you do affects me and you?!
-Fine, let's just focus on what we're doing here, shall we? I'm confused about who I am, and how I'm going to face this life and lifeless world.
-I thought you were confused about something original..
-Well, you're not supposed to think!
-Fine!
-So how do you think I can solve all of this mess?
-That's not for me to decide, you choose the way and you lead, and I'll follow.
-What? Then what's the point of all of this?
-If you can't see the point, then consider this whole conversation as something that didn't happen.

The Art of Squeezing a Lemon

2010-07-14T15:26:00.003+03:00

It's tricky, difficult and smelly, yes that's it, the art of squeezing a lemon. I've had my share of that experience many times, so I thought why not share it with other, who might have done it but haven't really thought about it.
A Lemon is a beautiful thing, it makes food taste more acid, giving flavor to it, however to get that flavor some hard word must be done. You have to cut the lemon and then begin to squeeze it, or so you'd think! Squeezing the lemon is actually the last part, and is there any other part left, you may ask, and the answer is "Why yes!", getting rid of the seeds inside it.
Allow me to explain a bit before I go on any further, some like to squeeze and then what comes it of the seeds they'll get rid of it last, but I do it first, therefore that makes squeezing a lemon an art, because everyone has their own special approach to it.
Going back to what I was saying, after having cut the lemon in half now it is time to search and search for the seeds and get them out with the slightest lemon juice coming out during the process. And now when you see nothing, all clear beautiful yellow inside, search some more, because there are always those wicked ones that come out while squeezing and you have to get them out of the bowl. That's it? Not quite, now began the journey of squeezing til the last drop of the juicy lemon.
Am I mad? Perhaps!

مبادرة في مدونة أكثر من حياة

2010-07-14T15:20:00.002+03:00

إلى القراء الأعزاء
إليكم هذه المبادرة الكريمة من الكاتبة هدى الجهوري فهي تعرض 10 نشخ من روايتها الأشياء ليست في أماكنها
يمكنكم المشاركة و الدخول في السحب و كل التفاصيل موجودة في هذا الرابط:
http://morethan1life.blogspot.com/2010/07/10.html

2010-02-21T22:10:00.002+03:00

For those who are in Oman:

Check this blog out:
http://morethan1life.blogspot.com/
It's is a great blog to reviewing Arabic or Translated-To-Arabic books, by an Omani blogger.
It's offering a chance to win a 10 OR coupon for Muscat Book Fair, here's a link to participate, it's a piece of cake, just comment writing your name and the Publishing house you'd like to buy from, :
http://morethan1life.blogspot.com/2010/02/blog-post_7600.html

تصفح هذه المدونة الرائعة عن الكتب:
http://morethan1life.blogspot.com/
تعرض هذه المدونة فرصة رائعة للفوز بقسيمة بقيمة 10 ريالات عُمانية للشراء من إحدى دور النشر في معرض مسقط للكتاب الذي سيفتح قريبا، لذا اغتنم الفرصة، ما عليك سواء التعليق على هذا الرابط و كتابة اسمك و الدار التي ترغب في الشراء منها:
http://morethan1life.blogspot.com/2010/02/blog-post_7600.html

Facebook Sisters! and Updating!

2009-08-09T23:52:00.003+03:00

This post is not going to be about facebook, let me make that clear, however it's going to be about something I've noticed happening there! You know how sisters are like right? Well, they're girls, and so you get the picture!
Still don't know where I'm going? Ok, I'll tell you without further delay, why do sisters who live in the same house wall each other and comment on pictures they probably have taken for their sisters, and the thing that really gets to me in wishing each other happy birthday!!!! It's so fake! I mean get a life, seriously!! Why would anyone do that?
I mean what's the whole point of it, and a wife writing on her status that she misses her husband so much and can't wait til he comes back from whatever trip he's taking!
It's so funny! You know, what my brother, who doesn't approve of the whole facebook thingie and doesn't have an account, said and it was completely true, he said: what's the whole point of it, updating my status and tell everyone what I'm doing, like I'm going to the bathroom > next status: Ohh, I wanna go to the bathroom so bad, > next status: In the bathroom... >next status: Finally, relieved!

Ok, I got carried away, he only said the first status as an example, and I wanted to make my point here, I could go on and on about Facebook observations, but those will do for now, :)

Quite Amusing!

2009-08-09T23:44:00.003+03:00

I live in Oman, let's make that clear! and if you don't know about Oman or how it's like, let me tell you something to give you perspective: it's a really quiet and peaceful country, and its people are really kind and so on, now you got the picture, right?
well, here's what I found , or rather what my sister pointed out, when we were walking on the beach, written on a wall:

I was really amused, that I took a picture of it!
now you can understand the source of my amusement, specially if I'm living in such a country!

Harry Potter 6 Moments

2009-07-12T21:23:00.003+03:00

Here are some scenes I would be looking forward to watch in the movie, hopefully they won't change them much,

Harry and Ron talking about the Unbreakable Vow
Harry: "...what does it mean?"
Ron: "Well, you can't break an Unbreakable Vow. . ."
Harry: "I'd worked that much out for myself, funnily enough."

Mr. and Mrs. Weasley asking each other to make sure they were themselves and not Death Eaters
Molly: What is your dearest ambition?
Arthur: To find out how airplanes stay up.

This one is just a thought,
Harry and Cho were now too embarrassed to look at each other, let alone talk to each other; what if Ron and Hermione started going out together, then split up? Could their friendship survive it? Harry remembered the few weeks when they had not been talking to each other in third year; he had not enjoyed trying to bridge the distance between them. And then, what if they didn't split up? What if they became like Bill and Fleur, and it became excruciatingly embarrassing to be in their presence, so that he was shut out for good?

Ron received a silly necklace with 'My Sweetheart' printed on it from his girlfriend 'Lavender Brown'
Harry: "Nice. Classy! You should definitely wear it in front of Fred and George."
Ron: "If you tell them, I.. I.. I'll.."
Harry (grinning): "Stutter at me? -- c'mon, would I?

Between Hermione and Lavender:
Lavender Brown: I happen to be his girlfriend!
Hermione Granger: Well, I happen to be his... friend.

A conversation between the headless ghost and Harry, the ghost is praising Harry, and tell him about what other ghosts are thinking:
Sir Nick: "Harry Potter knows that he can confide in me with complete confidence,’ I told them. ‘I would rather die than betray his trust.’“
“That’s not saying much, seeing as you’re already dead,” Ron observed.

The Grand Prize goes to this one, it's hilarious:
“But Potter seems to have a lot to say on the subject,” said Snape, pointing suddenly at the back of the room, his black eyes fixed on Harry. “Let us ask Potter how we would tell the difference between an Inferius and a ghost.”

The whole class looked around at Harry, who hastily tried to recall what Dumbledore had told him the night that they had gone to visit Slughorn. “Er — well — ghosts are transparent —” he said.

“Oh, very good,” interrupted Snape, his lip curling. “Yes, it in easy to see that nearly six years of magical education have not been wasted on you, Potter. ‘Ghosts are transparent.’”

Pansy Parkinson let out a high-pitched giggle. Several other people were smirking. Harry took a deep breath and continued calmly, though his insides were boiling, “Yeah, ghosts are transparent, but Inferi are dead bodies, aren’t they? So they’d be solid —”

“A five-year-old could have told us as much,” sneered Snape. “The Inferius is a corpse that has been reanimated by a Dark wizard’s spells. It is not alive, it is merely used like a puppet to do the
wizard’s bidding. A ghost, as I trust that you are all aware by now, is the imprint of a departed soul left upon the earth, and of course, as Potter so wisely tells us, transparent.”
“Well, what Harry said is the most useful if we’re trying to tell them apart!” said Ron. “When we come face-to-face with one down a dark alley, we’re going to be having a look to see if its solid, aren’t we, we’re not going to be asking, ‘Excuse me, are you the imprint of a departed soul?’”
There was a ripple of laughter, instantly quelled by the look Snape gave the class.
“Another ten points from Gryffindor,” said Snape. “I would expect nothing more sophisticated from you, Ronald Weasley, the boy so solid he cannot Apparate half an inch across a room.”

Final thought: Ronald Weasley. (<3)

Boston Legal

2009-07-12T21:00:00.003+03:00

I was watching 'Boston Legal, season 1' with my father, -yes, he loves that show.- while reading, but as I knew better I got interested in the episode, even though I don't like that show much, but this particular case they were handling was quite interesting, so here it is:
'Their company is representing a Sudanese native who is suing the U.S. government for not taking action against the mayhem that is happening in his country.'
The Defense lawyer said that this case was based on nothing, they can't sue the US for its political decisions. However Shirley Schmidt had some interesting argument:
The US promised to help with this situation, so other countries took the US's word and didn't do anything because supposedly the US is! But the government changed its mind and no body did anything to help because of the US! Our government is involved in some many countries' business! Why couldn't they simply have said 'Hey, that's not our problem!'
So the Defense lawyer replied that the government can't say that's not their problem.. so Shirley said: 'Then, that's the problem!'

I thought it was really true, and to the point!

Music and Movies updates

2009-07-05T18:49:00.005+03:00

Sorry to have kept you for a long time with no music or movie updates, but here I am again, suggesting what to listen to and what to watch, and what to not!

Here's a list of songs you should listen to (old and new, starting from the coolest):
- Te Amo - James Fauntleroy (you can also check out Rihanna's version, but his is way better)
- Trouble is a friend - Lenka
- Poker Face, Just Dance - Lady GaGa
- The Boom Boom Pow - Black Eyed Peas
- Never say Never - The Fray
- New Divide - Linkin Park
- I don't think I love you - Hoobastank
- Don't Give Up Feat. Lady GaGa - The Midway State
- White Horse - Taylor Swift
- When Love Takes Over - David Guetta Ft Kelly Rowland
- Kelly Clarkson's album 'All I Ever Wanted'
and of course Halo by Beyonce, No surprise by Daughtry, Please don't leave me by Pink and Battlefield by Jordin Sparks.

Now what to watch and what to not
Watch:
- The proposal
- He's just not that into you
- Grey's anatomy season 05 (it rocks!)

Don't watch:
- Watchmen
- Knowing
- Made of Honor

30/6

2009-07-01T12:24:00.003+03:00

Another topic needs to be addressed, 30th of June is the day the American troops in Iraq left the cities of Iraq, Iraqis have been waiting for this day a long time, to see if the US will delay that date or not, yet they did not, and so began all the celebrations and joy in Iraq. For Iraqis to fully be in charge of the cities.. Everyone is optimistic, because they're own sons and brothers are working hard against terrorism and to keep it safe for Iraqis... The world should be happy for them, yet I heard only one Arab leader congratulate Iraqis for this day from the middle-eastern countries, specially Arabian countries! I've even heard some countries to be doubting that Iraqis won't be able to do this job well!! Why is that? Is it too much to share this joy? Well it's no surprise, I mean where were they when terrorists bombed cities and innocents die, if they didn't make a stand then, no wonder they're silent now.. You know, we don't need them, we're happy and let them too busy with whatever they're doing.

you go PM, we're all behind you!

It'd getting out of hand.

2009-06-30T23:09:00.004+03:00

They are filling Arabs' heads with pathetic romances, and they are falling for it..
They're airing the most stupid tv shows and our lovely women here are believing every single word between those stupid lovers! Laugh with them, while I laugh at their stupidity. Women in fact has been divorced because of these shows, and little children are being named after those heroes and heroines. wow, imagine this with me...
'hey dad, how come my name's noor?' said the little girl innocently.
'oh honey, there was this great tv show you're mother was crazy about, she wanted to have a little boy so she could name him after the star of the show but you came in stead and so she named you after the character of the female star'
At first I though this was a phenomenon and that it was going to end soon, yet the channels want good ratings every night that's why they can't stop bringing new tv shows and with every new one, the more stupider they get. Yet the more interested people become. Not just women, no but men also, everyone seems to be not only watching but loving it and can't get enough of them.
I just want to grab some people sometimes by the shoulder and shake them to snap out of it.
This matter has gone out of hand and it needs action, yet I cannot do that. Those channels won't stop airing them because they're getting high ratings each night, so why stop something so popular? It's absurd, right?

Oscar Movies, and few more!

2009-02-13T21:48:00.003+03:00

Well, since it's the Awards season, there have been a lot of strong movies these past months, and so I have watched some good movies:
1. The Kite Runner (as good as the novel, and the author actually appears in the end! If you have read the novel, you should watch the movie. If you haven't read the novel, then HELLO? Go read it)
2. Bedtime Stories (Here's a shocker: an Adam Sandler movie with no swears! coz it's Disney. It's really funny though.)
3. The curious case of Benjamin Button (A great movie, really! It has to win the special effects oscar. Because the movie deserves it! If you want to see Teenager Pitt, go see it, lol. No, go see it anyway.)
4. The transporter (Yeah, it's old. But I've never watched it before. It's kinda good.)
5. Get Smart (Well, I've always loved Hathaway, so it was great to see her in a comedy. I expected it to be funnier but still it was better than I thought it'd be)
6. Pineapple Express (Just a crack-up movie. and I've always <3ed James Franco!)
7. Wall-e (One of the best animated movies ever! Genius.)
8. Changeling (never loved Jolie, but this movie is great! Really! It's amazing. And it's terrible to hear that it's based on a true story.)
9. Seven Pounds (If you want to watch the movie, you mustn't know anything about it. It's really great.)
10. Slumdog Millionaire (The best! love it! didn't get disappointed at all!!! And it's one of the few movies that its music got to me in the cinema! Just awesome!!!! And that cute Dev P. Awesome! I'm glad that an Indian movie (although some were British) but still! And the dance at the end was amazing!!!!)
11. Yes man (well, it was hilarious. Really funny. Love Bradley Cooper!)

WEll, there you go. That's all. However, I just finished watching Ella Enchanted. It was good too, lol.

Arabian Gulf Countries in Muscat

2009-01-18T00:56:00.004+03:00

The Gulf Countries, for those who don't know the countries, are: Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Kuwait, Bahrain, UAE and Oman.

While people are dying in Gaza, look what people in the Gulf Countries are busy with!
This cup includes Iraq and Yemen, both aren't from Gulf countries, but are on the same region!
Impor. Info.: The FIFA doesn't acknowledge this Cup as an official Cup, it's only a regional Cup, however people take it VERY seriously!
The cup this year is in Muscat (or was, because it ended today), it happens every 2 years!
People from all around the Gulf Countries came here to cheer for their country's team! Here they all wear Omani flags and they've put it on the roof, messed their cars, wearing scarves, dresses, hats, hair that has the colors of their flag!
Seriously! every time they win a match they're in the streets dancing half naked, and doing all sorts of crazy things!
Here are some pictures:

Now let me give you the full account behind this craziness!

Oman's team is very strong, they're really good, the 17th Cup, they were in the final match against Qatar and Qatar won (the cup that year was held in Qatar), and the 18th Cup went to the UAE after the final match with them against Oman (the cup that year was held in the UAE), when UAE won Omanis said that UAEian people burned their Omani flag and they hit their cars and it got ugly, this year UAE got out in the semi final matches, and so Omanis hit the UAEians' cars and it got ugly too! And The people in charge of directing and shooting, on the opening night, they're supposed to show each team on tv, but they didn't include UAEian team on tv, so the UAEian press got really pissed and demanded a public apology (and none was done) and some still keep talking that people from different countries love each other and their brothers and that kinda crap that everyone knows isn't true!
There's been too much talk about this Cup! It really makes people hate each other!
Now since Iraq got out I don't care who wins, so I watched the penalties only!
so now is the 3rd time Oman's in the final match in a row! So the Omani people were really confident that they'll win! And they did, with the penalties 6-5 against Saudi Arabia!
This is the first time ever Oman's won this Cup!

Now, Iraq was expected to get to the finals too but dunno what was wrong with the team most of them were injured and they didn't play well and they didn't have a decent training by the coach so we got out early..

The 21th Arabian Gulf Cup will be help in Iraq in 2013, so that will be really interesting to watch, they're building a whole city for sports and such stuff, so that's a good thing to be done after so many years!

In the end: "Congrats to Oman"

My English, Yours and Theirs!

2008-10-22T21:53:00.005+03:00

My English:
It's not perfect, but I like to correct other's English, and I always find mistakes in what our teacher says or writes.
I've got some made-up words that I've translated literally from Arabic like:
-Kiss-assers (which is ass kissers)
-Favor-denials (favor deniers = ungrateful)

Their English (At school)
Many (they read it as: Money)
"I talk about" Always saying that, present verb and that's the way they form all of their sentences.
Or when they do a presentation, they all start with: "Today, my presentation about ..."
And while giving definitions to words in English they go like:
Cancer: disease al sara6an!
"Can you ta36eeni daftaresh?" < this is a practice to using *can you* in real life!
Countries: Italy: Italia, France: Franca, and so on.
Programmes: brameg! *she said it like that, even though it was written in the book and it's not a new word for us*
Middle-eastern's English:
It shows more in their accents! Egyptians' accent is the most famous accent (no offense to Egyptians) they talk like:
za wezer is lovely (the weather is lovely) :P
In general Arab's accents in English are funny.
Also I've noticed a sign on a wall at the UAEian borders telling drivers to drive carefully and at the end it said: "Best Wishers!"

Introducing Arabian shows!

2008-10-01T23:06:00.006+03:00

cAnother attempt to criticize:
Ramadan is a holy month that muslims should do the good things and that kinda stuff, but some misunderstood this! By making Ramadan, a season for tv shows!

So here's how tv shows are in the middle east:

- Syrian shows:
There's the shows that talk about Syria in the old days, you have the courageous men with mustaches , women who are afraid of their husbands, people with morals, men and girls who don't see their spouses until the wedding night.

Also there's the social modern shows, that talk about the daily life problems, some are good, but others are tal6esh, not well plotted. Lately, I have lost interest in those kind of shows because they're showing one side of the Syrians' life, which is about Christians and Muslims, and also talk about love over-powering everything, that lovers do whatever they want and not consider their parents or their religion or anything!

But I still respect them, because in their shows they talk about everything and I mean everything, and I love them when they show their people-in-charge and make fun of them for stealing the country's money, which is very true.
Usually the Syrian shows are the best, with their comedy and the easy accent that everybody understands.

- Egyptian shows:
They're with the Syrian shows in the importance, people watch them for the cute accent, and the strong women whose tongues are longer than them!
Usually they're about poor families or too rich families, and the problems between them, a good thing this Ramadan they dropped the marrying-in-secret problem, because they've over dealt with it.
Although they need to drop the leading-man/woman character which is the too good person and all of the world against him/her!

- Khaliji (Gulf countries) shows:

There's the shows about the tooooo rich families and the man of the family doing what he wants and drinks and is with hookers, and all of them deal with drugs, drinking, hookers! and they're all sooo sad, and depressing!
And the actresses!! They put way too much make-up and have made so many plastic surgerys that they've stopped counting!

And there's the funny shows, that are really hilarious but the problem is that not many understand their accents.

- Badwi: (The origin of Arabs, and how they used to live, in tents and with camels, can't label which country they belong to but Jordan mostly, because most of the actors are Jordanian and the accent is kind of close to them)
They talk about revenge and wars that pass on to generations.

Now, if I have forgotten anything, please do remind me!

Some criticism that must be public!

2008-09-12T12:07:00.001+03:00

-To Middle-Easterns mostly: When you're bored, don't say : "I'm boring!" It might true, because some people sometimes find ways to occupy themselves and find entertainment, but I'm sure you don't mean it that way when you say it, it's ok! You know limited English, improve it and start saying :"I'm bored!"
See, not so hard!

-To guys: While online, if you find something funny but not funny enough, DON'T use "Hehe". It's horrible imagining a guy say it! Try using "Haha" - Although I don't prefer it, but it's still better than that Hehe el shen3a- Or simply use: :D

-To those who have regrets after buying anything: Whether you return the item you don't want anymore, or shut up and remember why you bought the first place and wear it or give it as a gift or just forget that exists, choose what suits you most, but don't complain!

-To those to pretend to get something or to know what they don't: You got it wrong, as I or anyone, try to make you understand something correctly, then you say that horrible: "Yeah, I know!". It makes you want to say: "No you don't! You just said the exact other thing. It's not a crime to get something wrong!" But you just get so pissed off that you want hit them but you let them be.
It's ok if I told you something and if you didn't know it to act surprised or excited! Don't just say: "Yeah I know" or "It's ok" When I'm 100% sure you didn't know before!!

-To those who are on a diet because of someone forcing them, or those who make plans to start dieting (always) "tomorrow": If you lost a kilo or two, who would notice, if you're doing if for yourself, that's fine, but if you're forced, no one would notice, and the person who forces you will be on your back everywhere you go! And you who make plans to start tomorrow and count everything you eat, is that a life?

To those who force others to diet: Leave them alone. 7aram! It's a horrible feeling to have someone watching everything you eat (been there), people want to eat as much as they feel is enough and when someone's on the watch, you'll eat secretly and you'll eat more! So leave us alone!!

Can't stop posting about!!

2008-09-06T23:09:00.003+03:00

Here's a new blog post..
Yes, Ihlamurlar Altinda's not showing on MBC anymore, that doesn't mean I'm not watching it anymore, every now and then I watch some clips :)
Bulent Inal!!! (Yilmaz, Y7ya)! Vote for him for the most beautiful people of Turkey:
http://www.enguzel100.com/index.php?secim=01&kimlik=161
Click on the five stars!

If you're interested to find out what happened in the end of Ihlamurlar Altinda سنوات الضياع
Here, you can read and enjoy the story of the best tv show ever:

http://itsmeyepa.blogspot.com/2008/08/real-devastation-yahya-still-doesnt.html

Ihlamurlar Altinda: The End! سنوات الضياع: النهاية

2008-08-14T21:10:00.026+03:00

MAJOR SPOILERS!! for those who don't want to know the end, DON'T READ!!

New character: Fareeda! Yahya hits her by his car, so she loses her memory, Yahya takes her to his family and they take her in as one of the family. Omar meets her and they fall in love! Then she finds out that she was a belly dancer! Omar and Fareeda have a lot of problems, because he doesn't want her to dance and she says that she has to because they need money. So their relationship is all ups and downs.

Real devastation!

Yahya still doesn't know that Lamees is pregnant! and he is willing to forgive her for accusing him of trying to kill her brother, because he knew she regrets her act deeply.
Lamees's mother and brother (Omar) find out about her pregnancy and they tell her to hide this from Yahya, because they don't want them back together! She's mad at her family so she goes to the farm house.

Lamees decides to tell Yahya that she's pregnant, and she invites him to dinner, he agrees to come.
Lamees's mom goes to Yahya and shows him a document from the hospital saying that Lamees is 1 month pregnant (in fact she is 2 months pregnant, but her mom tells the doctor to do that! because Yahya and Lamees have been separated for about 2 months. And she doesn't want them together!), she plans the whole thing with Taim.
Yahya doesn't believe her at first but when she shows him that document, he loses it, so he goes to Lamees but sees that Taim is with her giving her a present for the baby! so he doesn't talk to her but just walks away!
Lamees keeps waiting him and then she goes to his sister's place and he goes to talk to her, she tells him that she's pregnant with his baby but he doesn't believe her and she's shocked that he accuses her of such a thing!
A real dilemma because they both have a right to be mad! AHH!

Lamees, Omar and her mother find out about Taim and they know that its his fault that Omar's in jail because he got them in a losing project! and he bought bad material for the building!

Lamees convinces Taim that she loves him in order to get Omar out of jail and get their house back.
Lamees, Omar and her mom are living in the same neighborhood Yahya is living in with his family, because they were broke! And then things between Omar and Yahya ease up, and they slowly become friends!

One time, Omar tells Yahya that Lamees still loves him and she doesn't think of anyone else, so Yahya is confused so he goes and asks her if that's his baby she's carrying or not but she tells him that it isn't his baby!!!! Because she's so angry with him for accusing her of cheating!

Then Omar goes to jail because Taim doesn't pay the money, then Omar has some medical emergency and they take him to the hospital, he bleeds a lot so he needs blood and then Yahya gives him blood.

Plans for engagements and marriages

Meanwhile Yahya gets engaged to Sahar, and then they find out that she has brain cancer!

Lamees accepts Taim's offer to marry him, which is part of the play, Omar gets out of jail and they get their house back, although they continue living in the same neighborhood.

Then when Yahya finds out about Lamees marrying Taim, he arranges a meeting with her and Taim's mother, and she tells Lamees that Taim is dangerous and that he killed his father!!!
Lamees already knew he was bad but she didn't know that he was a murderer!!!

Taim finds out that Lamees is playing him so he forces her to marry him by threatening to kill Yahya if she didn't! so she agrees because she has no choice.

Yahya goes twice to her when he finds out that she's still going to marry Taim, and he offers to help her but she tells him that it's her decision.
Then Lamees's best friend goes to Yahya and tells him that Lamees is marrying Taim because of him, to protect him! AHHH!

ACTION! ACTION!

Yahya goes to the place Taim and Lamees are marrying and pulls a gun and tells Lamees to come with him, Lamees wants to but she can't because 4 men have guns ready and Taim puts a gun on Lamees's baby! so Yahya puts the gun down, and then Taim's men hit Yahya and Taim kidnaps Lamees!!

Then Yahya and Omar search with the police everywhere but they can't find her.

Lamees does some things to draw attention and to help them finding her:
1. In the yacht, she speaks to the coast guards and they come but Taim finds out and convinces them that the trans meter is broken and doesn't work!
2. In a public toilet, she writes on the mirror, Yahya's number and asks anyone to call him and tell him that she was there.
3. In a house far away where Taim has put her, she manages to escape out in the woods but she's too tired to walk so Taim finds her and brings her back to the house.
4. She grabs Taim's mobile when he's away and calls Yahya and tells him in which area she is!

Yahya and Omar search that area but can't find out which house she's in, then Taim tells Lamees that they're leaving, she manages to delay him one day, but the next day, he puts her in the car and goes to check upon the house if they've left anything, so she rings the horn so many times, and then Yahya and Omar know that that's Lamees and they go and find them! but Taim goes in the car and drives, so there's a car chase!
The car that Taim and Lamees are in, one of its tires blows up, so Taim goes out of the car and grabs Lamees with him and takes her to a cliff, then puts a gun towards Yahya and Omar, he sees that he's trapped, so he decides to jump and takes Lamees with him, but Yahya goes closer and then Taim shoots Yahya!! The police takes Taim, Lamees goes to Yahya and tells him to stay with her, Yahya says: "I haven't forgetton you!" Then he passes out!
They take him to the hospital, Sahar and Yahya's mom stare at Lamees and blame her for what happened to Yahya.
Lamees decides to tell Yahya everything when he wakes up and never be away from him again.
In the bathroom, there's Sahar, Yahya's sister and Lamees, Sahar washes her hands with very hot water so her hands get burned. Lamees's confused that Sahar didn't feel a thing! So when Lamees and Yahya's sister are alone, his sister tells Lamees that Sahar has brain cancer! Lamees understands why Yahya is still with Sahar, so now all she cares about is Yahya being in good health and she decides to leave them in peace and not to bother them.
Yahya is in danger! He goes into surgery, but then his heart stops and the doctors give up but Lamees goes into the intensive care room and tells the doctors not to give and she's very hystrical and the doctors try their best and after some time his heart starts beating again!
The doctors say that he's better now, and that he's no longer in danger. Lamees goes to the room he's in and talks to him but he's still in comma, then he opens his eyes and then closes them again.
Then Lamees decides that she doesn't want to bother him again ever again, so she leaves the hospital, and then Yahya wakes up.
The first word he says is "Lamees" and asks where she is, they tell him that he survived because of her and that she didn't leave him while he was in danger, but then she left when he was better.
Everybody comes to see Yahya and to check upon him, even Lamees's mother, who is very grateful for what he has done!
Lamees goes to the hospital with flowers, she sees that Sahar is with him, so she gives the flowers to the nurse and tells her to give it to him, so the nurse does.
Yahya asks the nurse who gave her the flowers, the nurse says: "I don't know, but she was very pretty"
Sahar goes to put the flowers in a vase, Yahya leaves his bed and goes out of the room to see who sent the flower, so he sees Lamees leaving and he says: "Lamees"

The long conversation!

Then Yahya goes to his house, and everybody is happy that he's ok.
Yahya goes out of the house to see Lamees, he finds her planting flowers, so he says: "Very nice flowers"
She's very happy that she saw him and that he's ok,
He says that he came to check upon her and see how she's doing. And offers his help to her and her baby. He offers to help her with the flowers, so he sits beside her.

He says: "You came, and you stayed with me in the hospital, and you sent me flowers, but why did you leave?"
She says that she didn't want to bother him, but he tells her that he was upset when he saw her leaving.
He says that he's happy that she's comfortable now and she says that she thanks God that he's ok. She asks him if he's still hurting, so he says that it doesn't hurt him much, but the pain comes and goes. He says that it reminds him of her!

Lamees says: "Yahya, you shouldn't be here. You need to rest. You need to go home."
Yahya says: "You're kicking me out" with a smile.
She doesn't say anything so he stands up to leave, then she says: "I didn't mean that. I'm just worried about you" Then she starts crying, he goes closer to her and holds her in his arms!!!
After some time, she realizes what they're doing so she says: "What are we doing? and Sahar? We shouldn't!"
Yahya says: "Lamees forget everything! Let's enjoy this moment and not think about anything. You're here with me and you're ok, I feel like I'm in heaven."
She says:"I was thinking about you. If you're ok. I didn't want to leave! I wanted to stay with you. When you got shot, you told me something."
He asks her what did he say, she asks: "Did you forget?"
He says: "I don't forget anything that is related to you. You're my soul and if I died, I would have died happy because I died for you! You're here in my heart, let's go"
Then they go for a walk!
They talk and they say that they regret what they had done, she says that she wants to tell him everything and she doesn't care what might happens.
He tells her to forget the past because all is forgiven and forgotten and that he accepts her the way she is and he's willing to raise her baby!!
so Lamees wants to tell Yahya that she's pregnant with his baby but she realizes that his wound is bleeding so she insists on taking him to the doctor but he refuses, he says: "No, Please. I don't feel pain when I'm with you. Let's enjoy this moment. Let my wound bleed, if it's bleeding for you, then let it bleed and bleed."
She's worried about him so she takes him to the doctor and the doctor says not to worry, it's not dangerous, so he changes the wound's bandage.
Sahar calls to check upon him and makes things awkward between Lamees and Yahya, because Lamees feels guilty for Sahar.

His Promise

Then before Lamees leaves to her house, Yahya says: "This ring should have been for you. I got engaged to Sahar to forget you! But I didn't. So now what to do?"
She tells him: "We won't do anything. We'll leave things the way they are. I love you when you're away and that's enough for me."
So she goes home, and her best friend asks her what happened, so Lamees says: "Nothing, but I feel like my heart's about to pop from its place."

Meanwhile Sahar's wedding dress is done and she tries it on, and everything's going well for her. Yahya is unhappy with her and Sahar begins to feel that!
At night Yahya goes to Lamees and tells her that he loves her and that he'll figure it out and that they'll wait til Sahar does the brain surgery then they tell her, because they planned to get married after the surgery (I mean Sahar and Yahya) and he tells her to wait for him and have faith in him.
At the same time, when he went out of the house, Sahar followed him and saw him holding hands with Lamees, so she goes home crying and she grabs her stuff and leaves to her house (because she was staying with his family)
At the morning Yahya goes to Sahar's house and finds her there and she hasn't slept all night, he brings her water but she drops the glass and then she holds shattered glass in her palm and she bleeds a lot but she doesn't feel it until Yahya notices.
She tells him that she saw him yesterday with Lamees, he tells her that it was just a visit and that everything's over between them.

Happiness can't last long

Sahar tells him if its so then she wants to get married before the surgery to feel better. So he takes her to the doctor and the doctor says that the tumor has grown bigger and that they'll have to do the surgery sooner.
Sahar asks the doctor if it's ok if she got married before the surgery, Yahya says: "I don't want you to tire yourself"
The doctor says: "No, it would be better if you got married, it will better the patient's mood and will make her feel happy." So Yahya agrees because he has no other choice.

He meets Lamees on the beach and tells her that Sahar wants to get married before the surgery and she understands everything and she tells him that they're not meant together because obstacles meet their way everytime. So she asks him to smile because that's the way she wants to remember him, so he smiles with a tear rolling down his face!!

They start preparing for the wedding and they choose an invitation card. Then, they throw a party before the wedding, but only for girls so Yahya doesn't go, instead he goes to Lamees, he tells her to tell him anything, to stop him from marrying Sahar and he'll do anything she says.
Lamees cries but only says: "Go Yahya, Sahar is waiting for you. Go!"
Yahya goes as she says, Lamees's mother tries to convince her to stop the wedding but Lamees doesn't!
On the wedding day, Yahya is very gloomy, his friends drag him to the barber to shave.
Lamees's mother goes and sees Sahar and tells her that Yahya still loves Lamees and that he doesn't love her. Sahar doesn't believe her but she starts having doubts.
Then, on the way to the hotel (where they're having the wedding) the cars stop and the car that Sahar and Yahya are in stop in front of Lamees's house. Lamees and Yahya see each other!
Then, Lamees's mother, couldn't stand seeing her daughter this unhappy, she went to the wedding and went to Sahar's room and told her that Lamees's pregnant with Yahya's baby!
Lamees finds out that her mother went so she went after her to try and stop her but she couldn't.
Sahar and Yahya enter the wedding hall, Sahar tells Yahya to tell her that he loves her for just one time, he doesn't. He only says: "Sahar, let's walk. People are staring."
Then he sees Lamees! Sahar goes to Lamees and tells her: "You're nothing but a liar. You came here to kill me."
Then, Sahar runs away but falls and they take her to the hospital and they do the brain surgery for her! Lamees is very upset with her mother for telling Sahar.
Then, Sahar gets better, Lamees decides to go away for a while, away from everything, to rest, so she visits Sahar in the hospital to see how she's doing!
"I'm happy that you're ok" Lamees says.
"Thanks." Sahar says.
"Did you tell Yahya?"
"No, I didn't"
"Good. I'm going away. You're going to get married and live happily"
"But why didn't you tell Yahya that it's his baby you're carrying not Taim's?"
"I did. But he didn't believe me."

Then Lamees's on her way out, Yahya comes in the room, he asks how she's doing. She says she's fine and tells him to take care of Sahar, then she goes.

The biggest mistake!

Sahar goes out of the hospital, she goes back to live with Yahya's family, but she's still not fully recovered.
Yahya brings her, her medicine, one time, so she tells him: "How do you know that Lamees's pregnant from Taim?"
"Look, let's not talk about that. That subject is closed." Yahya said.
"But what if it's your baby?"
"Look, I saw the hospital's report. I read the baby's actual age!"
"Oh poor Lamees, you believed a piece of paper and didn't believe her! Any woman would leave you if you accuse her of cheating!"
Then Yahya starts thinking, and turns to Sahar who nods and tells him, "It's your baby! Go! Go to Lamees, she's leaving today!"
Yahya's surprised! But he's very happy with the news, he hugs Sahar and goes to his sister and hugs her and tells her that he's going to be father and goes running to Lamees's house!
Lamees's already on her way to the house in the mountains, Yahya doesn't find her there, he tells her mother and brother that he knows that it's his baby. He asks Lamees's mother about the hospital report and she tells him that it was fake! He says he can't understand why she did that, but he says that all doesn't matter because it's him who has made the biggest mistake because he didn't believe Lamees, he should have listened to no one but her.
Lamees's brother tells her that Lamees too made a mistake with her pride, he told Yahya that he wanted to tell him but Lamees forced him not to!
He tries calling her but she doesn't answer, he calls her best friend and goes to her, she gives him the address of the house and tells him: "Finally, you know!"
Yahya says: "You knew?!"
"Even the deaf knew! Listen go find her,If you two break up again, I'll kill you!"
Yahya goes in the way to the house, the road is closed because there has been an accident, he goes to see who's hurt, he hears people saying: "Oh poor girl" "So young!"

Finally!!!!

But thank God it's not Lamees!!! Then he finally reaches the house but doesn't find Lamees. He calls her best friend who tells him that she might be at the market buying stuff.
So he goes and sees her! Lamees's confused which to buy (baby's clothes) the red one or the blue one! Yahya comes from behind her and says: "Buy the blue one, it's a tradition when it's a baby boy!"
She drops the bags in her hand when she hears his voice, they hug! but she asks him why he's here?!
He takes her to the house and tells her that Sahar told him about his baby and that she sent him! Lamees's very happy because he finally knows that it's his baby.
Yahya says: "Forgive me Lamees, I'd give you my soul, just forgive me"
She says: "I've forgiven you long long ago!"
Then at night, he feels the baby kick for the first time, he tells her that they need to go to Istanbul tomorrow to do something important. She asks what is it?
He says: "It's something official but I have to ask you first!" Then he goes on one knee and asks her to marry him, and of course she says YES!
They get back to Istanbul, and he goes to tell his mother that they're going at night to ask for Lamees's hand from her family, and they do!! Everyone's so happy and everything's perfect, then Lamees goes to Sahar to see how she's doing and to thank her!

Meanwhile Taim escaped from jail and he's planning for mischief!

Birth!

Then, they decide to go back to the house in the mountains to rest and be alone together, Lamees sees Taim, Yahya assures her that Taim's in jail and maybe she's confusing him with someone else.
Then, on the way to the house in the car, Taim's in a car after them, Yahya suspects that someone is following them, Taim opens the window, only Lamees sees him, she freaks out, they get out of the car, Lamees's in pain, she screams. In Yahya's car, one of the tires has a hole! Yahya tries to call for help but there's no coverage, so he carries Lamees and takes her to the house, he goes to the hospital but the official work hours are over and no one's there so he goes to a local woman who gives birth to women, she tells him that the last baby she gave birth to was dead, he tells her hat Lamees needs help fast and that she has to help them so she goes with him. Then Yahya calls his friend and tells him to bring an ambulance with him to the house in the mountains.
Lamees's in so much pain, she screams alot then she gives birth in a really hard way because she's only 8 month pregnant, she tells Yahya: "I'm very sleepy, and if I don't wake up, let Sahar raise our baby, and marry her. Promise me!"
He tells her that this talk is useless and that she'll be ok, so she goes into a comma because of the amount of blood she lost, then the ambulance came and Yahya breaks down and starts crying, he says that it's his fault they came here! His friend (Akram) tells him to stay focused and that Lamees needs him now, Yahya doesn't hear anything that's why Akram slaps him and tells him to wake up. Then Yahya gets back to reality and they take Lamees to the hospital. Everyone waits them there, Yahya sits with Sahar and tells her what was Lamees's last wish and she tells him that Lamees is strong and that she'll live and that they'll raise their baby! She tells him if there's justice in this world then Lamees will live.
Then the doctors tell them that the surgery was a success, Lamees wakes up and sees the baby and they name him "Zein" Everyone's really happy.
Taim went to the hopital and tells the nurse that he wants to see his baby -he's so twisted that he thinks the baby is his- the nurse is new so she prepares the baby to give it to him, Sahar goes to see the baby and finds Taim there so she yells at him and takes the baby and tells the security to go after him then she brings the baby to Lamees and gives a sign to Yahya to follow her, she tells him that Taim was there! He brings a lot of men from his company to protect them, he doesn't tell Lamees anything, they get her out of the hospital and takes her to his house, he brings a lot of security and police to look for Taim, Lamees asks about Taim, Yahya tells her that he ran out of jail when she saw him, but the police found him.
Then they have a little gathering to get married legally, but without a wedding or a white gown.
Everyone is very happy for them, then they leave them alone in the house, Lamees wants to change for their baby, so she goes to find some tissues and she sees the newspaper with an article about Taim and his escape from prison, she goes to Yahya and asks him about that! He tells her to calm down, and that he didn't want to worry her, she finds out that he was at the hospital, so in that night, she doesn't sleep, but keeps holding her baby close to her because she knows that if Taim got a chance he'll take her baby away from her!

Oh Baby!

In the morning Yahya tells Lamees to get some sleep and that he'll keep an eye on the baby and won't leave him, he asks her if she trusts him, she says that she trusts no one else, so she sleeps. Then, Yahya calls Omar and he has to talk to him about a real important thing so he goes to him.
A fire starts at shop, so they all go to try to put it out. They find out some petrol so they know that someone did but they don't know why, then Yahya knows that it's Taim and that this was a set up to get everyone away from the baby. Meanwhile Taim goes into the house and takes the baby, Lamees wakes up and doesn't find the baby so she goes out and one of the guards that Yahya put to protect them and that Taim has hit, tells her the way Taim took, she goes after him bare footed, she runs. Yahya runs very fast to thehouse but doesn't find anyone, he takes the same road that Lamees took. Lamees sees Taim putting the baby in a car and going away, she yells and tells him to stop, then Yahya finds her and they take her home!
Lamees is in shock, Yahya goes to talk to her and try to calm her down, she tells him: "Don't touch me! Leave me alone" She goes to her brother and tells him to take her home.
Yahya wants to stop her but his sister tells him that he'll never know what a mother feels! He tells her: "I'm her husband and this is her house! I've lost my baby and my wife at the same day, how did that happen?!"

Then, everyone searches for Taim and the baby and the police too, but they don't find them.
Yahya goes to see how Lamees is doing, he tells her: "What I've done! I shouldn't have left
you two alone, I'm sorry, please forgive me"
"Not until you bring me my baby!" Lamees says.
"I promise you that I'll find Zein" Yahya says. He tries to reach out for her but she's too
shocked to react, she's just looking at her baby's photos, Yahya says, "Please Lamees don't
do this to me!"
Then, he leaves her, he blames himself for what has happened.
Then, Taim doesn't have a babysitter because his photos are in the newspaper, and the
baby's crying and he's not drinking milk. So he calls Lamees and tells her to come alone or
she'll never see her baby again, so she writes the address on a notebook and cuts the paper
and goes. Sahar hears her on the phone with Taim so she tries to stop her but she can't so
she calls Yahya.

Lamees goes alone and holds her baby, Taim is so twisted that he thinks that baby is his!
Lamees tries to convince Taim to let them go but she fails at that.
Then, Yahya goes to the police, but he's helpless, he doesn't know what to do, so he tells
Sahar to tell him again what happened exactly, so he sees the notebook and he knows the
address by reading the marks that were left on the next page.

He goes alone, but the police goes after him, Lamees sees him on one of the television

cameras, she tries to distract Taim, she takes the baby and goes to Yahya who gets in by

climbing the high wall.

They want to escape but Taim comes with a gun, he wants to shoot Yahya because he's the one
who's in the way of his happiness, Taim tells them that this is his baby and that he'll
raise it. Yahya tells him: "How are you going to do that? In jail?!"

Lamees tells Taim to kill her, if it's the only way that she'll get rid of him, Yahya stops
her and gives her the baby and tells her: "If I die, tell our baby how much I loved you!"

Then the police comes and surrounds the place, Taim sees that there's no escape and he
doesn't want to go back to jail, so he shoots himself in the head!

Then back at the house, Yahya asks Lamees if she has forgiven him, she says: "What are you

saying? You're the one who should forgive, when he took away my baby from me, I lost it."
So they decide never to mention Taim's name again, then Lamees's mother and Yahya's mother
tell them to go outside and enjoy each other, and they'll take care of the baby.
So they go and they go to see a house near by and they decide to buy it.

The Beautiful End!

Later on, Lamees and Yahya go to see the house, before they go in she tells him: "Oh I
can't wait til it's ready and furnished!" So they get in and she finds the house ready and
everything's set! So they go and live at that house, one night, Lamees and Yahya are on the
sofa holding each other, he tells her: "Finally we're alone!"

Then the baby starts crying, so Yahya says: "I'm sure Zein's after us, he can't leave us a
minute alone!"

After some days, everything's going great, except for Omar and Fareeda who have ended their
relationship and they broke off their engagement!

Yahya tries to bring them together but fails, he gives Omar a hard time about making
Fareeda that sad.

One day, Fareeda is really hopeless, so she tries to kill herself by inhaling gas, Yahya

and Lamees go to see how she's doing so they find her and they take her to the hospital!

But she gets better, Omar goes to see her and he says that he wants her back and that they
can work out their problems, she tells him that he only said that because he's sorry for
her.

That same night, Yahya goes Omar and yells at him and says: "You're not a man! You have no
dignity! That poor girl was working to get money for you and you don't appreciate what
she's done! You don't deserve her!" Then he punches him on the face and leaves him.
Fareeda decides to leave, Omar thinks about what has Yahya said to him, so he goes to her
but they tell him that the bus will leave after 15 minutes, so he goes running to the bus
station, but he finds that the bus has just left, so he runs and yells "FAREEDA".
so she gets off the bus and they get back together!

Lamees and Yahya's mother are talking, Yahya's mother gives her, her wedding dress, she
tells her that she would have loved if she wore it, but she says that married in a quick
way. Lamees thanks her and tells her that it's ok, what matters is that they're together.
Omar and Fareeda go to them and they tell them that they're getting married as soon as
possible.

One day Yahya and his sister talk, she tells him: "Can you believe that this could happen?

Life's very strange!" He nods and says: "Rafif was the first girl I've fallen in love with,

my first love, then Lamees! I love her and my love is as strong as it was so many years

ago, and that's real love. She's my only hope in this life"

Lamees hears him say that and she smiles.

Fareeda tells Omar when they're alone: "I feel sorry for Lamees, I saw the way she looked

at the dress. They should've had a proper wedding."

Then Omar has an idea, on the wedding day, Omar takes Yahya with him and Fareeda takes

Lamees, and they enter the wedding together, Lamees and Fareeda in their wedding gowns, and

Omar and Yahya in their suits.

After 5 years, the whole families and couples are out in a picnic, Lamees and Yahya have
two kids now, a girl and a boy, Yahya says: "They say that love ends."
"That's a liar who said that!" Lamees said.
"I love you more every day, and I'll keep on loving you my whole life."
"Promise me!"
"I promise you by the days of the years that were lost that I'll keep on loving you."
"I promise you too!"
Then the little girl says," I promise you too"
They laugh, then Lamees tells him that there's something important she wants to tell him,
she says: "I'm pregnant"
He's soo happy, he kisses her then says to everyone, "Hey! The third is on its way, Lamees
is pregnant!"

Information about: Ihlamurlar Altinda - سنوات الضياع

2008-08-14T20:55:00.006+03:00

hello people!
The show has 10 more episodes, that means 2 more weeks! I thought I'd post in some information about the show.
Turkish name of the show:
Ihlamurlar Atinda
Meaning in English:
Underneath the linden trees
In Arabic:
تحت ظلال الزيزفون
Number of episodes in Turkey: 80 episodes, 1 per week.
Name of the show in Arabic:
سنوات الضياع
Meaning in English:
The lost years.
Number of the episodes in the middle east: 150 episode, 5 per week.

MBC (the channel that broadcasts the show in the middle east) has made many ads for the show, the most recent one is very good:
Yahya is very sad to know that Lamees is pregnant from another man, thats why he says this:
"I've lost so many years, thinking that everyone in this life has one partner only in their life, I was wrong"
I love the ad!!

here's the latest episode, the 1st part from it! it's one of the best episodes of the show:

Ihlamurlar Altinda - سنوات الضياع : The lost years!

2008-07-01T21:39:00.010+03:00

Even though this is a very long post, but please do read it because the story in the show is really worth it!

I'm introducing you to the best tv show ever (I know I've said so about Heroes, but this show is nothing like it. The love story in it is.... I have no word that describes it, wonderful- great- awesome- etc aren't enough):

A story about a poor guy (Yahya in Arabic, Yilmaz in Turkish) who was in love with a girl (Rafif) from his neighborhood

who left him for another man (Omar) who is very rich and she marries him. Yahya is broken-hearted and started hanging out with Omar's sister (Lamees -Filliz-) to try to make Rafif jealous but ends up falling for Lamees and she falls in love with him too.
Rafif gets pregnant and gets very sick, and so she is hospitalized. Yahya goes to see her and she tells him that she still loves him and that she shouldn't have left him and says that she's sorry. Yahya tells her that there's nothing to be sorry about and that he's not upset with her. After some time she gives birth to a baby girl and she dies during giving birth.
Meanwhile, Yahya's friend (Kamal) who has some stocks from Omar's family company, leaves Yahya in charge of that company and be the manager of it.
Yahya asks Lamees to marry him and she accepts and so Kamal and his wife(Jumana) plan a engagement party
and everything goes well, except Kamal dies!
After some time, on the day of the wedding (that Lamees's family know nothing about because they wouldn't approve of such a thing) Lamees's father gets very sick and asks to see Lamees and tells her not to marry Yahya and insists on her promising him not to marry Yahya and she promises her father!!! And then he dies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She obviously doesn't go to the wedding, but later that day she goes to Yahya and tells him that their relationship won't work out and calls off the wedding and Yahya asks why but she only tells him that they're not right for each other!!!
Omar and Lamees go to work in Italy and after 4 YEARS they come back, Omar doesn't get along with his little daughter but then he gets along with her, she's the cutest little thing ever.
Yahya tries so many times to ask Lamees why did she leave him but all of his attempts fail.

Here another character pops up which is Taim who is Omar's and Lamees's old friend , who loves Lamees and tries to hook her up but of course she's still in love with Yahya.
Then Yahya decides to sell the stocks of Omar's company to Omar, but he demands 10 times the original price!! They can't afford such a price! But then they manage to get the money with the help of Taim, then they go see Yahya and give him the money, then he tears the check they gave him and he tells them that their stocks' worth is a penny! and he gives it to Lamees and goes!! AHHH!! (in a really long time, Yahya gave Lamees a horse as a gift, but she said that she can't accept it unless she pays for it, and so he says that she should pay him a penny and when she knows he's serious, she gives him a penny and accepts the gift, and so the same penny was given back to Lamees which means that these stocks mean nothing to Yahya)

One night, Lamees went with Taim to a party where Yahya was there and when he saw her, he left but on his way out, she went out for him and then Taim came out too, Yahya and Lamees were in a heated conversation
Yahya grabs Lamees's arm and takes her with him and puts her in his car and she goes with him although she tries to fight a little bit but then surrenders and he takes her to a house in a farm far away. AHH!!! And he asks her why did she leave him? and she can't say why and so he gives up and tells her to go if she wants, and so she does, but on her way she trips and starts crying and sit somewhere and then someone comes in the dark behind her,
of course it's Yahya!! AHHH!! he takes her with him and they make up and get back together and he makes her breakfast. Then, Omar and Taim report to the police about Yahya and then the police comes and takes him but Lamees says that he didn't kidnap her and that she went in her own will.
After some time, Yahya's mother comes to Lamees and tells her that she wants her away from her son because she only brings him trouble!! Lamees is embarrassed but stays with Yahya,
then Taim tries to set Yahya and Lamees apart and he sends some men to to hit Yahya and he is injured but no serious damages.
Then, after some time Taim sends the same men to shoot Omar but not kill him and make it look like Yahya did it. They put the gun in Yahya's car (they stole the gun from Yahya's company, so it's considered Yahya's gun!)
Now Yahya is on the run because he wants to prove that he didn't do it! Then when Lamees finds out about the gun goes to Kamal's wife (Jumana) and tells her: "Yahya did it! I can't believe I believed him." Jumana tries to calm her down but then Yahya (yes, he was there!) says: "Don't bother Jumana! She judged and won't change her mind! I'll prove to you that I'm innocent but it'd be too late when you find out! Remember that" And that's where the problem lies!!!
Then Yahya finds a tape showing that the gun was stolen and he turns himself in but the police let him go because they know he's innocent! Yahya finds out that Taim is behind this! but he hasn't any evidence that convicts him.
Now, it is too late! Lamees goes to him a lot of times and tells him that she can't live without him, that she loves him so very much, that she's sorry! but all that won't do. He can't forgive her!
One time at a party , Taim kisses her and she slaps him! And goes to Yahya but he just opens the car for her and tells her to go!

Another character pops up which is Sahar, Jumana's friend, who's also working in the same project in Omar's company. and ends up falling in love with Yahya!

Taim: tries to set Omar's company up and joins them in a project that he knows will make Omar's company bankrupt, and all that is done to make Lamees come to him! That man is sick! he's obsessed with her, he has her pictures everywhere in his house!

After some time, Lamees finds out she's pregnant! when Taim finds out he asks her to marry him and she takes her time to think, Taim tells Yahya that he's going to marry Lamees, Yahya tells Lamees to marry Taim (because he was angry!) and she says that she'd take his advice but she goes and says no to Taim.
When Lamees's brother and mother find out that she's pregnant, they go mad, and they want her to abort the baby but she refuses! Then she goes to Taim's house and sees the pictures he has of her and she know that he's obsessed with her, but she doesn't think him as a real threat!

This Picture ROCKS!!!

and then she wants to tell Yahya that she's pregnant, he doesn't want to listen to her and so she follows him somewhere where he went with Sahar, and there Sahar tells him that she loves him, at the same moment he sees Lamees and runs to her and asks her why she's here, she says she has something very important to say (but after she saw him with Sahar, she decides not tell him) he says to her that when she accused him a part of his love for her went away and won't come back! and he told her to marry Taim, Lamees tells him that she said no to Taim. Lamees is deeply hurt by what he said, and doesn't tell him why she came and she walks away.

After some time, they have a decent conversation and he tells her that Taim is dangerous and that she should watch out and she doesn't think that he's dangerous but promises him to watch out. And he says to her that while he is alive, she won't get hurt ever! AH!!!

Omar decides to sell a project that Lamees and Yahya worked on a long time ago and many poor people work there, when Yahya finds out he goes to him and tries to fight, Lamees tries to break them apart but they don't listen to her, Yahya says to Omar: You can't do this! This is my project and lamees's and many people work here!
Lamees faints, it's related to the baby, and so Omar takes her to the hospital and Yahya follows her and Taim and Lamees's mother come to the hospital. Yahya sees Lamees and tells her that he was really worried about her, but he still doesn't know that Lamees is pregnant.

Now this all happens in about 110 episodes, I promise there won't be any follow ups, until the show ends,
Sanawat el daya3 isn't as popular as Noor but all those who watch it know that it's so much better because it's well-plotted. and Yahya!!!!!!!!! I love him!!!!! He's amazing!!!

Now here's a video that will make you laugh with them even though you don't understand what they're saying, do watch it:

Problem: Unknown!

2008-07-01T15:40:00.003+03:00

Hey bloggers,
I'm here to talk about something I've noticed about me on the long run,
1. In my old school days, I would sometimes search for the eraser and tell everyone to look for it and then in some magical way I discover that it's in my hand.
2. This also happened in a very long time, when we finish eating, I take some plates with me and head to the bathroom and then realize that 'this ain't the kitchen'.
3. When one of my family asks me to bring something, I go to where the thing is and then come back to them and tell them to tell me again what exactly they wanted, because I forgot!
4. One time I had the mobile in my lap and I wanted to get out of the car, forgetting where the mobile was and when I got out I knew I dropped something and it was my mobile!
5. This one happened very recently, I put toothpaste on my tooth-brush and then I put the toothpaste back and then before I started brushing my teeth, unaware of what I was doing I took the toothpaste and opened it and wanted to put it again on my toothbrush, but I saw that there was already toothpaste there, so all I did was laugh at myself.

There has been so many little incidents like this, but I fail to remember but those.

I've been trying to find an explanation to them, I mean I was so young when most of these things happened so I can't say it was because of aging! It's simply not having full awareness of what we're doing and where we are.

And forgetting isn't my thing, I remember a lot of things! But all I can say is sob7an allah! and may Allah be kind upon us, we the human race!

2008-06-18T17:38:00.002+03:00

In schools in the middle east, they have taught us about "el foto7at el eslamia'' and how the prophet PBUH used to free people and invite them to Islam. But now as some people are accusing our Prophet and Muslims of violence and the problem is that some Muslims have doubts. It is only natural to have these doubts but the problem lies in having no one to make those people's faith strong again and then they began to question Islam and let those people who hate Islam effect them.
Now people are trying so hard to find faults in Islam and to make Muslims doubt Islam and to make them less believers.
Here lies the role of the family and the parents because schools don't teach us how to response to people when they talk bad about Islam and when they insult our Prophet and that's a big mistake. Instead of repeating the same facts that we have learned by the heart, teachers can bring up new issues in the class and discuss them and make students believe again and know what's right and what's wrong. And here's another obstacle which is "discussing" because we don't have that in the middle eastern schools, because when they talk about these new issues they just make a lecture or preach and they don't allow students to say what they want or even to ask some questions. Also if students have the opportunity to ask, they wouldn't because we're not used to that in schools.

I'm bringing this up because a friend of mine questioned Islam and didn't know what to think because my friend was somehow convinced about what other people said or thought about Islam.
I'm not preaching anything but I don't know the point these people who talk about Islam in that way and trying to find alibis to make people think wrong about Islam.

Also I've noticed some irrelevant things being brought up together which are: beards and Hijab!
Some people want the Iraqi government to be without people wearing or having those, because they think it's only bringing Iraq backwards instead of forward. Yes, some men have beards just to show how religious they are when in fact they don't know anything about Islam, and yes the Iraqi government maybe would be better with less of those fake religious men. But Hijab! Aren't muslims supposed to know the purpose of it? but they obviously don't!!!
Yes, some wear it because they have to and some for fashion purposes (don't how that works but I guess it's there) and some wear it because it's a tradition so the reasons differ but all for the same thing.
We need people to know why do we wear Hijab!!! because some actually chose to wear it! believe that or not! so I just don't know what do they have against Hijab, if they don't want to wear it, don't! and stop there and shut up about it!

Another issue that is Muslims in foreign countries like the UK, USA and these countries. I have noticed that there are two kinds of muslims there, 1. those who are strict muslims and they watch every move their kids make and so on. 2. those whose kids don't know a single Arabic word and they don't know anything about Islam. and just the other day we were discussing about who should be blamed for this? the parents? the kids? and we thought that the kids didn't have anything to do with moving or anything and they just don't know how to learn because they have their parents who chose to not teach them anything about where they come from and whats Islam. so it's really the parents fault that they decide not to talk to their kids in Arabic or teach them about Islam. and well it's problem even though parents think that they don't have anything to do with the middle east anymore but what if they come back one day will their kids be considered as Arabs? or as Muslims?

so I just wanted to say some things about Islam-related issues and what I thought about them, and there I've said it. :)

A Pocketful of Sunshine!

2008-05-26T23:41:00.004+03:00

hey people! I'mma be gone for a while because of exams, wish me luck :)

so I listened to this great song, by Natasha Bedingfield - A Pocketful of Sunshine. you should check it out it's awesome. and I know this band on youtube that rocks, so I thought I'd mix them together, here's the lead singer of the band doing a cover of this song, he does it his own way and he's really good, you can check out other great covers by him. He's amazing. so here it is:
Enjoy ;)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeJEBYF6_N4

~ SONG ~ !

2008-05-21T20:37:00.003+03:00

So I haven't updated you on what's new and hot at the music world! Let me do that,
Here are a list of the great songs We're listening to these days:
Let me start with OneRepublic (they're awesome awesome awesome!) :

-Dreaming our loud (Hello sir, we look for Monday. Confident we'll get there someday)
one of our favourite songs Ever:
-COME HOME (hello world, hope you're listening, forgive me if I'm young, or for speaking out of turn! --- they're in the wrong place trying to make it right, but I'm tired of justifying, so I'll say you'll come home, come home!)

Leona Lewis:
-Better in Time (coming going thought I heard a knock, who's there? no one! thinking that I deserve it, but I realized that I really didn't know) GREAT song.
- Yesterday (they can take tomorrow and the plan we've made, they can take the music that we'll never play).

John Mayer: Why Georgia and Daughters.

- Take you there - Sean Kingston
- Stand - Rascal Flatts
- Hands on me - Vanessa Carlton

They're thinking for us!

2008-05-16T17:19:00.003+03:00

I've been having these thoughts these last weeks:

"A bomb in Baghdad" "People killed in Palestine" same headlines, and we! we don't even care, we watch the news with a dead heart. and we see those horrible pictures/scenes like it's a normal thing.

We don't have our own opinion over anything now, our opinions are served to us on tv, when we watch the news, we only see what they want us to see, and they only show it from their point of view -don't know who's they-! Al-Jazeera for an example goes -or supposingly goes- by this: "al ra2i w al ra2i ala5ar" as in it shows different views.
We've stopped watching it ages ago, I don't even know if we have it now or not, and I don't even care.

There are a few channels that don't give you personalized news, and they give you news from an objective point of view and let you decide what you want to think.
Surely there's a lot of news we're not hearing about, this world has some terrible stuff more than we know, maybe more than we can imagine.

Our teachers always ask us about the news when they have watched to brag about that and to tell us that we should be updated on what's happening in the world. but if we ask them what's happening in the world in a day they haven't brought that up they'll tell that: my kid was screaming all day, or I've been busy grading your papers or any other excuse! Well, we've never asked them so that's just me imagining what they'd say.

And also apart from the news, when they advertise for anything they say: It's the best!!!
well, let us decide, how about that? :P

Bugged...

2008-05-16T16:34:00.002+03:00

It's Friday, and I'm bored.
I'm dressed up, dunno why?! I'm not going anywhere today but I thought I can dress up at home :)
Since yesterday we're planning to make a strawberry milkshake but something everything come up, yesterday we didn't have milk, so mom got us milk and now we just figured out that we don't have vanilla! :'( don't know when we'll make it? but I'll tell you how it is when we make it, it's going to be the first time that we'll ever make a milkshake. :)

Exams are coming up, they're were supposed to be on the 26th of May, and we were supposed to finish on the 3rd of June, now we're starting at the 31th of May and we don't when we'll finish.
"So just four days! Not much." Correction: SIX days!!
"That way you'll have more time to study" Why would we want that?!
They think that we're finishing really early and that's why they delayed them, they made the timetable for the exams. ARGHHHHH! I'm so *bugged*!

Nightmares and a fall?!

2008-04-24T23:08:00.002+03:00

Well, I've had my share of nightmares, and some have been really scary, but this one is the most freaky nightmare I've ever had. It was a horror movie, with a masked killer who was after us and we hid somewhere and then we found him on the ceiling watching us :S then I opened my eyes and kept checking the room, I was even afraid of the sheet. But still I managed to sleep after that.

I've been thinking lately about falling in class, seriously, not as in planning to, but I can see myself falling in class and in a presence of a teacher. I've been also thinking to fall to get this thought out of my head. Maybe I won't do it, but I'll just see if I fall. I know it's strange but I can't help these thoughts from coming into my mind.

Nothing :)

2008-04-18T19:21:00.002+03:00

Hey everyone, it has been a really long time since I posted something here.
*Reminding you to check my new wordpress blog: http://stealingtheshow.wordpress.com/ and please do comment!*
Well, school's keeping us busy, we've got exams and homeworks as usual. and then there's our funny science teacher, who we laugh at her not with her! :P I've made the whole class believe that she likes me :P and now they're on my back whenever she's around!
Now let's update your music statues (although they're not all so new):
No air- Jordin Sparks Feat. Chris Brown
Collide - Howie Day
Nine at the afternoon - Panic! at the disco
Get it shawty - Lloyd
Why Georgia - John Mayer
Love like this - Bedingfield Feat. Kingston

so just thought of posting even though I had nothing to say. Take care ya'll.

Wednesday!

2008-03-13T00:17:00.002+03:00

here are some things that happened today:

Received our first birthday gift.
The new english teacher/trainee from the uni came today for the first time!
The English competition went well.
Our English teacher did something not good! :S
Dad got back from Egypt.
We watched Step Up 2: the streets.

Now if you have been reading and checking out my blog, then you're welcome to check out my other blog :)
http://stealingtheshow.wordpress.com
and if you were to check it out and read it, I recommend that you read my posts there from the oldest to the latest!
Now take care everybody and enjoy life! ;)

new songs!

2008-02-20T23:06:00.003+03:00

It has been a while since I updated you on music! Yeah, you! You're gonna know a new artist or more! Here is some of the new songs I've been listening to (btw: not all of these songs are new)
and this list contains a lot of my favourite songs, they're soooo awesome!!!!
- Follow Through- Gavin Degraw (if you want to be with me then you have to follow through)
-Say - John Mayer, I finally like something for him :D (take out all of ur so called probelms, better put them in quotations)
- Leavin - Jesse McCartney (don't stress, girl you deserve nothing but the best)
- Breathe - Anna Nalick, it's one of the best songs ever with the best lyrics, (and I feel like I'm nakes in front of the crowd, 'coz these words are my diary screaming out loud) *thanks to Grey's anatomy for this song*
-Droplets - Colbie Callat & Jason Reeves, you can feel the love in his voice, it's a really deep song! (You left a mark I wear it proudly on my chest) *thanks Victoria*
-Carry you home - James Blunt (the strong as you are, tender you go, I'm watching you breathing for the last time) finally I like something for him *Thanks Waed*
- ONE WORD - ELLIOTT YAMIN!!!!! I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!
- Over you - Daughtry, he's awesome! (well I never saw it coming, I should have started running long long time ago)

To HEROES

2008-02-12T22:10:00.000+03:00

This is to the greatest show ever! it made my holidays interesting!
Today I finished the 2nd season and I can say that it's my favourite show ever! and they've putten the coolest cast ever! Milo Ventimiglia (Peter, I can't say much about him, he's AWESOME) , Hayden Panettiere (Claire, she's really cool, and to West in season 2, he's gorgeous) , Zach(Sylar, the evilest grin I've ever seen), Adrian (Nathan), and everyone, I loved Santiago (Isaac Mendes) and Masi Oka (Hiro,he's so cool) and my favourite of all times MILO! :D and Ali Larter is such a great actress and Greg (Matt Parkman) and (Mohinder Suresh) but I didn't like Simone's character! :P
and (Adam Monroe, I've loved him on Alias and I love him more now, I mean the actor)
and everyone on this show! and of course I've got to mention the creater of this show Tim Kring.
I've watched this show online and although I didn't see one show, -couldn't find it- I hope they air it here so everyone can enjoy it!
so I just wanted to thank everyone on this show, and you should watch it if you can.
so if I got any name wrong, it's alright, thats what I could remember!

"Marriage is like a prison!"

2008-02-04T23:27:00.000+03:00

As most of girls when I was young, I thought that marriage was really awesome! and I thought I'll fall in love with a guy and then we'll get married! as simple as that!
but now, -or a while ago- it seems that someone -I don't know who- is trying to change that idea of marriage -I don't know why too-, We're getting all of these messages and e-mails about how marriage is horrible and all of these stupid jokes.
The idea is that the guy is always the one who doesn't want to get married and the girl forces him to! and he's always silent and his wife is always blabbering. And the wife is always saying how she feels but he's not listening and he's really bored with this life!
And mostly it's the wife's fault because she's so shallow or she's like a chatter-box, or she's too girlie to understand her husband! Anyone noticed this?!
I've noticed this also during reading 'the Zahir' by Paulo Coleho, it's about someone whose cheating on his wife and she knows, but she also knows that they've been in a phase of their marriage that these 'shallow' things don't mean anything because she's cheating on him too!!!! -well, that's not the plot of the book! but that's what I think! I just hated the book, and I thought it was sooo boring! but I finished it anyway-
And there's something their promoting to as well -I'm using the word promoting because I think it's happening and it's for a reason I fail to comprehend, maybe to encourage relationships without marriage but again why?!- and that is after a while people will get bored of each other, and they'll start to wonder what made them marry!
I refuse to believe all of this! I think it needs a little faith from both of them and they can 'make it work' as Ne-Yo puts it in his song! I think it's so real and true, and it gives me hope!

Also since I'm taking about these stuff, I might as well bring up guys in the middle east -some of them, as some say, but maybe it's most of them are this way- they're so good with words and they can make those stupid girls feel so pretty and loved, and then they can move on to another girl with no trouble at all, and then after all they'd never marry someone who they've been out with because they want to settle with decent girls! not knowing that they've fooled so many girls and they've broken so many hearts and broken so many promises, but maybe they know that and maybe it makes them think of how wicked they are. They're so disgusting! but maybe it's not just the middle-east, maybe it's a guy-thing!

but maybe I'm just being an Arab -and I hate them, or us, when they-we- do that- and pretend or like to believe that this is some kind of invasion?! and we're the victims? that's why I want to hear from you! Am I being like a typical Arab? or you've noticed what I'm talking about?!

Movies to watch!

2008-02-02T21:22:00.000+03:00

So as here the cinema is only in Muscat and the movies aren't so new, we usually watch them online, so here are some more movies that I've watched
August Rush it was really good, if you read the about the movie, you might think it's for kids! but it's not, it's really good!

The water horse: the Legend of the deep It's good, kinda childish and boring, but it's still really nice to watch!

Persuasion It's the greatest novel by Jane Austin after Pride and Prejudice (of course) it does the novel justice! and Captain Wentworth couldn't be handsomer (I probably should've used more, but whatever!) We were like *day dreaming* and we got so close to the screen! and let out a sigh! and we actually saw the movie on youtube, believe it or not?! it's there in 10 parts! but if you haven't read the novel, you should read it first then watch the movie! so what are you doing? still reading?! go read it! and it's ok you can stare in the picture (only if you're a girl!!! :P)

PS I love you although I didn't finish, I'm still looking for a working link to watch it online, but we watched most of it, and I gotta say that it's great, it makes you laugh and it makes you wanna cry! and all of those gorgeous actors in it! well, I'm sure it has a great end, It's a really good movie, and Hilary Swank is great, and it's really fun seeing her in a romantic movie.

Movies to watch:
Into the wild, the golden compass, wedding daze, and finish PS I love you and atonement!

My opinion on some issues!

2008-01-29T23:47:00.000+03:00

Topic 1:
I've noticed this a lot, not just lately, why do most of the singers put all of those almost naked girls in all of their videos?! I mean yea the directors do the video clip, but the singers agree!!
Enrique has them in most of his clips! and also Massari! and so much more! Can't we have some decent video clips, don't we deserve some? It's sick, and sometimes the song is really good, but the video ruins it, not bad videos, but videos with those girls!
And all of those Arabic singers do the same, and sometimes worse, all of those female-singers, who I don't know what they try to do, but it's plain stupid! and so are they. and also the male-singers, with those indecent girls!

I just wanted to say that because I've been thinking a lot about this.

Topic 2:
There's a phenomenon (not sure that's the right word, but couldn't find any better) that has being going on for awhile, before the Asian Cup, I noticed this on a lot of young Iraqis who don't know how to express their love for Iraq the right way! so they wear hats, necklaces, shirts that has the Iraqi flag on it, and putting pictures of it everywhere, and listening to 'Hosam Al-Rassam' and talking about Iraq and wishing to be there and getting all poetic like they have something to prove!
They don't need to over do it! It just gets on my nerves because I know some of them don't know what they're talking about, they just think that they have to do this, they don't really feel strong for Iraq, because if you really love someone/something, you wouldn't say that to everyone you meet! and you don't feel like you have to over do it, just pray and hope for the best, and inshallah things will get better!
and we have another type of Iraqis who are outside of Iraq, who talk in another accent and feel nothing for Iraq and wish they were from another place, and they just have nothing to do with it, but we also have the ones who are real and sincere and whose love will stand the test of time!

BTW: all of the lines that are on the 'authors lines selection' are written by me, just liked to give myself some credit.

movies and music Updates!

2008-01-23T21:11:00.000+03:00

Hello everyone, it has been a long time since I've written here, so much has happened, I've finished my mid-term exams and now I'm enjoying a month off school, doing nothing, listening to music and watching movies.
So here I am to update you on the music I'm listening to and the movies I've watched so far.
I finally watched Pirates of the Carribbean movies, well not all, but I've watched some of 'The curse of the black pearl' and I've watched 'At world's end' which was great! You should watch it, it's very funny!
I am Legend is good, but it makes you wanna scream, Will Smith is such a great actor, the movie isn't very unusual but it's kinda good.
27 dresses, we've been waiting to watch it so much, and finally we did, it's very good, if you got a chance, go catch it. It's great fun.
Alvin and the chipmunks is a hilarious movie, these chipmunks are sooo cute. and one of them is Jesse McCartney!
Surf's up is one of my favourite's movies, it's awesome!!

Music:
THIS LOVE by Maroon 5, it's the greatest song ever, I'm addicted, here's Michael Buble's version!!!

Better together by Jack Johnson, thatnks Zach for recommeding it!

In this life by Delta Goodrem, this song is kicking! it's awesome!

My soul pleads for you by Simon Webbe, a good song!

Updates..

2007-12-26T22:27:00.000+03:00

I've been listening to this great singer called: Vanessa Carlton, she's awesome. I know 2 songs for her! 'nolita fairytale' and 'a thousand miles'
Here's me dedicating this for you:

I thought of the live version because it explains what 'nolita' means! it's amazing!!! she plays the piano beautifully :P

also I've been watching 'heroes' it seems really interesting, I've watched 3 episodes so far, can't watch them now, I'm studying.. our mid-term exams are on the 5th of Jan. and we'll finish on the 13th of Jan. inshallah.
what a way to start the new year?!

and that's it from me, take care, and have a great closure with this year, I guess I won't write anything til the end of this year...
see ya, so long... til next year! ;)

Who's fault is that? the directors?

2007-11-30T19:49:00.000+03:00

In this post I'm going to mention some of the directors stealing ideas!
this first video is for a singer called "Shatha" and the song is "layaly al shouq"

check the video, reminds you of something? no? Maid in Manhattan. that's a movie for J. Lo. It's the same!

the 2nd video is a song for a singer called: "Pascale Mashelani" the song is called: "2aribni menak"

there's some stealing from 'a walk to remember'

the 3rd one is a song called: ''3reeb el 7al' for a singer called: "7ekmat"

now you've got to check it! the song is 'irreplaceable' it's obvious.

The 4th video is a song called 'makanak' by Bushra.

Can you guess?
It's 'we belong together'!! :O you should check out the guy that is supposed to be Wentworth Miller! Be careful, you might get a huge SHOCK!

Thats what I could remember, check the videos, see how some Arabs think we don't know anything, so we won't notice~ silly them!

The latest music

2007-11-28T20:48:00.000+03:00

I want to post something but I don't know what to talk about, so I'm just going to update you on what's new in music.
Brave 'thanks to the power of love I could love because I am brave' Jennifor Lopez love it!!!!
This boy's fire 'put me in water coz this boy's fire' Jennifer Lopez, Santana & Baby Bash

Now let me talk about the new Backstreet Boy's Album 'Unbreakable' it's so great!! love it!! it's amazing.
You should listen to:
-inconsolable, unsuspecting Sunday afternoon, unmistakable, downpour, something that I already know, panic, one in a million, ... and the rest of the album :D

enjoy, and if you have any recommendations, please do share them

why not get a little bit 'deep'?

2007-11-28T15:20:00.000+03:00

Some people are naive and some people are the exact opposite. I consider myself in the middle!!
Those naive people are in somehow a danger, because they think all people good and they don't use their brain in real life, so they could be easily persuaded, so they should have someone to help them through their lives and tell them the truth that not all people are good! and to protect them from those who mean nothing but harm!
It's a shame to see those innocent people who love everyone, it's sad really.
In this life those people can't survive without being hurt because they put their faith and trust in the wrong people.
so please don't let those people continue to live like this and enlighten them, I'm talking like this for their interests!

I'm Back!

2007-11-27T12:33:00.000+03:00

I know I haven't updated my blog, so here's a post, I'm dedicating some songs for you ;)
1. ba7ebak- Janat: It's a great song!

2.Suddenly - Ashley Tisdale, that's the only song I know for her and it's amazing!

3. Do it well - J. Lo feat. Ludacris

I didn't like the offical video clip, and I like the remix with Ludacris better

listen and enjoy! ;)

Tips, what to say or what not to say

2007-10-18T19:50:00.000+03:00

when you're talking to me online:

1. don't say 'hi, hello, hey' and then shut up! say how are you? after it.
2. don't let me just ask and you answer. ask too!
3. don't complement a lot.
4. don't call me "sweetie, honey, ..." I don't like being called with those names!
5. don't say you'll do something for me, and then don't! I'll keep reminding you.
6. if you're busy, just say so. don't leave me talking to you while you're wishing I'd just leave you alone! be honest.
7. don't say 'lol' to whatever I say,talk!
8. don't talk about school too much!
9. it's ok if you leave without saying goodbye!
10. share your experinces in life when you run out of topics to talk about!

that's all I could come up with..

I love All Girls. They ROCK!

2007-10-17T23:25:00.000+03:00

I've talked about what I don't like about guys in previous posts, so here's a post dedicated for girls, enjoy!

I have received: "You look thinner! Young girls! and diets!" from many old women..
Well, I haven't lost a pound since the last time they saw me, and sometimes when we're eating with people, they tell us: "Oh, you didn't eat anything" and then addressing my mother or father: "Are they on a diet?"
WE ARE NOT! and we have eaten the amount that made us full, we eat as much as we want, and I don't like those comments!
They think we're like some of the girls who worry about what they eat and how many pounds they have putten on.
I know girls like that who say: "Oh, we just have been to some people who said that the Pepsi they served is diet, but I know it's not, from its taste", "We don't eat dinner", "I don't eat french fries", as the last comment was made when she saw me eating it, but I just kept eating.
And it's even worse when it comes from their mother, who gives comments to her daughters on what to eat and what not to eat, or she's telling her daughter not to eat too much because she has some weight to lose. and my sister actually said to that woman: "Actually aunt, she's not fat, and she's young so don't be so harsh on her"
Yes, she's got some courage!
And also I don't like those girls who want to do everything that you do, and have everything you have (as in like it, not taking it from you) and like everything you like or the jealous type.
And those 'Stuck-up' girls, who see something in themselves that no one else does.
And those who can't read the signals of 'not interested in the topic', 'go away', 'not the right time for this'.
And those 'Oh, I can speak English very well', 'I won this or I have that'
And those who have a crush on some guy, and they go telling it to the girls, and the way he acts and blah blah blah. and he turns out to be the worst guy ever.
And those who are too rude and don't know where to stop.
and I don't like, let me just say some names: "Natalie Portman", "Scarlet Johansan", "Anglina Jolie", "Nicole Kidman, "Elissa", "Hayfa Wahbe", "Nancy Ajram" and few others

so if I forgot a type of girls that I don't like then it's their lucky day.

Music updates

2007-10-11T19:24:00.000+03:00

Here are some updates on the music I'm listening to, if you have any suggestions, please do share them.

"This love is so disfunctional, it leaves me so emotional" Can't let go - Linda Kiraly..
"you got a problem, come say it to my face" Impacto remix - Daddy Yankee Feat. Fergie
"I’m tugging at my hair I’m pulling at my clothes I’m trying to keep my cool I know it shows.. trying to be so perfect..." Things I'll never say - Avril -I've got to give the credit to Vic and Mia Rose, that's how I found out about this song, it's great!-
"so why does your pride make you run and hide?" Wait for you - Elliott Yamin
"It's the heart afraid of breaking, that never learns to dance. It's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It's the one who won't be taken
who cannot seem to give. and the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live" The rose - Westlife
"Girl im in love with you, This ain't the honeymoon, Past the infatuation phase, Right in the thick of love. At times we get sick of love, seems that we argue everyday" ordinary people - John Legend
"If you've anything to tell me, It had better be tonight, Or somebody else may tell me And whisper the words just right" It had better be tonight - Michael Buble

My movie soundtrack

2007-10-03T20:37:00.000+03:00

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc). Put it on shuffle & press play.
2. For every question, type the song that's playing. When you go to a new question, press the next button
3. Don't lie and try to pretend your cool... and alot of the songs fit with the setting

Opening Credits: Give it to me - Nelly Furtado & Justin Timberlake & Timbo
Waking Up: Keep your Hands off my girl - Good Charlotte
First Day At School: Real Love - Lee Ryan
Falling In Love: Hotel Clifornia - The Eagles
Fight Song: Where is your heart - Kelly Clarkson
Breaking Up: Crawling back to you - BSB
Prom: The Best damn thing - Avril
Life: Army of lovers - Lee Ryan
Mental Breakdown: The best day of my life - Jesse Mac.
Driving: We might as well be strangers - Keane
Flashback: goodbye my lover - James Blunt
Getting back together: Wonderful World - James Morrison
Wedding: Do you know - Enrique
Birth of Child: Tell me baby - Red Hot Chilli Pepers
Final Battle: Call me when you're sober - Evanscence
Death Scene: The one - BSB
Funeral Song: SOS - Jonas Brothers
End Credits: Stand up as people - Lee Ryan

Now let'sry it differently, this time just think of the songs that you
u would love to have it play during each scenes of your movie

Opening Credits: dreamer - Hil Duff
Waking Up: things I'll never say - Avril
First Day At School: vacation - simple plan
Falling In Love: A moment like this - Kelly Clarkson
Fight Song: shup up and drive - Rihanna
Breaking Up: Big girls don't lie - Fergie
Prom: promiscuous - Nelly Furtado
Life: Grace Kelly - Mika
Mental Breakdown: Bad Day - Daniel Powter
Driving: say anything - Good Charlotte
Flashback: Everything burns - Anastasia
Getting back together: it had better be tonight - Michael Buble
Wedding: the rose - westlife
Birth of Child: love is - BSB
Final Battle: what goes around comes around - Justin Timberlake
Death Scene: right back in the water - Jesse Mac
Funeral Song: from sarah with love - Sarah O'Conner
End Credits: Home - Michael Buble

Thanks Lucia for this post ;)

updates from my life!

2007-09-13T11:53:00.000+03:00

Me reporting to you from Nizwa school (I'm at the house now though:P) there's a new girl at our school, we just found out that she's Iraqi and so we went and had a little chit-chat with her, which we couldn't have a good conversation, she just knew that we were Iraqis too, we couldn't know her name, as to know who's her father!! and so we got some digging and we only got her first name! so that's a mystery to be solved, a reason to go to school!

Another thing, On Saturday, our Arabic, science teachers will come (they didn't come for 2-3 days, such glorious days!)
Also today is the 1st day of Ramadan (ramadan kareem to you all), really excited for it.
And our horrible English teacher, talks 'present' tense for the past and vise versa. "I said it one more time" which means "I'll read it again"
"Ball"= "Pool", and I'll stop talking about her!
*thinking of other stuff to tell*
ohh, and our life-skills teacher (life skills, its the 1st time I think what does maharat 7ayatya mean in arabic, life skills, its so weird, the phrase I mean) we had our 1st lesson on Wed. and she was trying to talk in formal Arabic and she said "a5eesh" I couldn't stop laughing.. and the girl next to me, kept making jokes and showing me her candy! I'll never sit beside her in a class again!
yea well, enough for now!
so long!

Arabic Movies!!!

2007-08-25T16:53:00.000+03:00

Let me talk about "Arabic" Movies!!
As the blockbuster of this summer was "Omar w Salma" and we all wanted to watch it! First we thought it was going to be GREAT! but as they continued advertising about it, we knew that the movie is going to suck big time! But still we needed to watch it!
And so we did, and from the first minutes of the movie we knew it's a disaster, still, we continued watching! It's about a player, Omar, who falls for a girl called Salma and she turns his world upside down, and he changed, he's no more a player! And Salma some how thinks he's cheating on her, -which he isn't, I told you he really changed!!- and then the girl who Salma thinks he cheated on her with -the other- her! -it's not so complicated, I'm just making it sound so:P-, so yes, she comes and explains to Salma that he wasn't cheating her, she just needed him help!
-that involved another guy fighting with Omar and Omar's shirt is torn apart, what a gentleman, I know! NOT-
And so they live happily ever after! There was one good thing about the movie! It's was really funny!! That's the only thing that is not just good but it's GREAT about Arabic movies! If you want to watch an Arabic movie, go see comedy! It's the BEST!
And we have a legend, his name is Addel Imam, He's a really famous actor! used to be so funny! But now I don't like him at all! His -horrible- movies: al tajroba al-almanya (or al daneemarkya!!), "3eemarab ya3qubean", "Morgan Ahmed Morgan". I didn't watch any of them, but I'm 100% sure that they suck!!!
Let's move to another kind of movies, "chick flicks", there's a director called: "Inas Al-dee'3eedy" and she says that in her movies she's just defending women!
Let me tell you how is she "defending" women. By movies like: "al ba7eethat 3n al 7oreeya",
She's just unbelievable, saying that they are just some daring ideas! And girls having sex with anyone that they meet! It's just sooooo sick! Now, a lot want her dead and hanged because of her movies, but that's just threatening, and every time she's preparing for a movie, critics criticize the movie before she even begins shooting, and so she puts a lot of inappropriate scenes more than expected, and she gets all the publicity that she wants through cirtics!
And another stupid movies 'asrar el banat' now I've watched it a long time ago, but I remember that it was about 3 girls, one who someone sents her pictures and letters and then she founds out that it was her step-dad, and one who's married, who thinks her husband is just plain and she wants him to be romantic, and I don't remember what the other one wants!
And there's a movie about 3 sisters, one who's dating an actor and she just got back from the UK and talks like she just been to the USA, and one who's boyish but she's in-love with someone she's teaching but she don't know how to act, and one who's in-love with a director and he directs her cook-show, and they all go to their psychologist neighbour, and he loves the one who dates the actor, and in the end she falls for him too and all the girls live happily ever after with the ones they love!
Another one, it's called "sahar el lyal' and that's really stupid! it's about 4 couples, and they cheat on each other with each other! Thank God, I didn't watch it, but I know what's it about!
And so many movies like that, I want to watch 'taymor w shafeeka' and 'a7lam el fata el 6a2esh', I think they're going to be funny!!
there's an actor who's in all of his movie, whether, super-crazy or super-wasted! movies like; karkar, el lamby, ..
OH! and another thing about Arabic movies, the songs that comes with them are FANTASTIC! that's also a GREAT thing!
I just love watching old plays, like 'madrast al mosha3eebeen' or 'el 3yal kebret' they're sooo funny!

Lamyia!!

2007-08-11T16:59:00.000+03:00

Chapter 1:
"stop eating" whispered an old women to her daughter who was sitting besides Lamyia, which was like a wake up call to her, because she was lost in her own world and that was no problem to be lost there but she reminded herself that her world could wait 'til she's alone. "You're daughter's weight is fine, you're just afraid she's going to be like you when she grows up, I just hate those who want others learn from their mistakes, what's the point of living?" she thought, while nodding at what that mother was saying about a stupid t.v show which the mother thought it was great. She was very grateful for not having such a mother.This was one of the families she didn't like because of how the mother controls what her daughters eat and other issues but this is the most important reason she doesn't like them.
She couldn't wait to get to her room because she couldn't stand being with those people for that long because she was afraid that what she was thinking might be stronger than her and without noticing she'd think out loud and embarrass herself, but she was relieved that she didn't do that.
She went to her room and turned her iPod on at the max. volume so she can have a good reason if she didn't listen to anyone calling for her. She was sitting on her bed with the thoughts of some lines from songs she was listening to as the "shuffle songs" was on choosing the songs for her randomly:"if loving you with all my heart's crime then I'm guilty" then "I would never wish you bad things but I don't wish you well" then "And burned the picture in a frame, but it couldn't save me" then "It's only small drops of pain, but even the rain can turn into rivers" and "Pay attention to me I don't talk for my health".
Her mother opened her door's room to check up on her and asked if she needed anything then she went and closed the door behind her.
Lamyia is out-going, too-honest, crazy and kind-of weird. Lamyia was tall and her body was in a good shape.
Fatma, lamyia's sister, came to lamyia's room in the evening and asked her if she wanted to go out with her. "Where?" Lamyia said."I don't know. Maybe to the movies" Fatma said. "or go out to dinner""nah, no good movies there, but going out to dinner might be fun, I'll ask Shaima to come with us"
"alright, I'll go get dressed"
Lamyia called her friend, Shaima, and asked her if she could go with her.
"No, I'm really sorry but I can't. I'm going to the movies with my mom." said Shaima.
"Oh, that's ok. maybe see you tomorrow" Lamyia asked.
"Yeah, why not? cya tomorrow Lumy" and Shaima hung up.
Lamyia got herself dressed and went out with Fatma.
During dinner, Fatma said, "you know, I'm going to France with my friends this summer"
"Really?? How come you didn't tell me before?" Lamyia said. "Is it a surprise? Am I going with you? Is that why you didn't tell me before?" and she was very excited.
"No, I'm sorry. That's not why. I've told you before about it, but you were so busy drawing something and I think you had your iPod on so all I got back then was 'really? good for you' "
"Ohh, when are you going anyways?" looking disappointed.
"After a week or so, but we're not going for a long time, just 2 weeks"
"good for all of you, enjoy!"

After couple of seconds, Lamyia saw one of the people who is on her list of "seriously get a life" which was a complete different from "get a life" list who were less hopeless than the others.
"Oh, there's Rami" Fatma said when she noticed him too.
"You mean: seriously get a life, get lost, move on and go away" Lamyia said "please don't come anywhere near me..." as he saw them and was on his way to them.
"Oh God, why do I have to go through this?" Lamyia said.
"Through what?" Rami said when he came.
"Hello" Fatma said "Good to see you here" trying to distract him because she knew her sister wouldn't keep her mouth shut.
"Through eating too much" Lamyia said. "hey Rami, How are you?" and Fatma looked relieved because Lamyia didn't finish what she really wanted to say.
"Ok, now you had your little chit-chat, walk away" Lamyia said, "Kidding. No seriously, your mom is calling you over there"
"My mom?" Rami said looking around. "I didn't come with my mom. I came with Ammar" looking very confused, but then he understood what she meant and smiled, " Ohhh, yes, my mom is calling me, I better go. Nice seeing you guys, Bye" and he left.
Fatma and Lamyia were both laughing and then Fatma said, "You know if you said anything more, you could have been rude."
"Yes, I know. A fine line between being rude and being funny." Lamyia said. "I have a talent not to go too far with me being so funny" Lamyia thought she should have stopped at the fine line between those two because the last joke was rather hopeless than "funny" which is why a joke is made.
Lamyia was her worst critic. She criticised every move, word, thing she did, so she let no place for anyone to criticise her.

Chapter 2:
Next morning, Lamyia woke up at 10 AM and ate breakfast and then her phone rang and it was Shaima. She picked up and went to her room.
"Say what???" cried Lamyia.
"Yes, I know." Shaima said. "Samar is coming to our school"
"I can't believe this, the people I like never come my way and I never get to see them" Lamyia said "But the people who are on every list I have always come my way, just yesterday I saw Rami"
"Be careful, he's my brother after all"
"Well, you don't choose your family, kidding. But I'm serious. My luck is so great at the moment"
"It's good that our school is just girls, so her brother doesn't come with her"
"I know, that 10 year-old kid is so annoying. He's so rude"
"He's actually 12, and I think you make a perfect match"
"Yeah, just my type. Younger than me, shorter than me, dumper than me and so good looking"
"I know, that's why I said so. Anyways you still didn't hear the bad news yet"
"Oh, I thought nothing was worse than these news"
"Well, Samar called me and asked if she can meet us"
"Ok, you mean the two of us?"
"Yeah"
"But why is that so bad? surely you told her an excuse?"Shaima was silent."You didn't!!!! My God, and when we'll meet her?" Lamyia said.
"Today at 6 PM, my house"
She finished her call with Shaima and then went to her mom and told her that she's going to see Samar today and told her also about how much she doesn't like her.
"No, She's such a nice girl" her mother said. "I know you, you judge people before you meet them"
"But I've already met her and my opinion didn't change about her" Lamyia said.
"That's because you didn't give her a chance and because you didn't bother to get to know her"
Lamyia knew that her mom was right as usual but she couldn't help complaining.
Lamyia got dressed and went to Shaima and found that Samar was already there, and the girls had fun and Lamyia was ashamed of herself because she was wrong about Samar.
After 2 hours, they went out to walk and get Samar home and at their way, they met Samar's brother and when he saw them he said, "Oh, isn't that the girl with her lists of people she hates?" mocking Lamyia.
She was so shocked he knew about this but she got a grip of herself and said, "Don't worry, you can steal the idea and the copy-rights"
Samar was laughing and also she made her brother to say hi to them and be nice or she'll tell their mother about him breaking the Chinese vase.
"Samar, I can't go home with you, I just saw Khaled, so I'm going with him" Her brother, Saad, said.
Lamyia looked around because she didn't know who Khaled was, and then she saw that he was a guy she only knew him by looks.
"Nice to finally put a name to that person" Lamyia said. "Thanks Saad, because of you I'm going to update my lists"
"But you don't even know him!" Shaima said.
"That's the point, isn't it?" Lamyia said laughing.
"And why are you hanging with old people? You should be around people your age" Shaima said turning to Saad.
"Ok, I'll see you guys later" Saad said ignoring what Shaima said.
They kept walking and then Rami called Shaima and told her to come back home for dinner, and so everyone went home.
"Samar is another one to be added on the list of "mis-judged people", I can't help to judge people, but I'm not giving any excuses for what I'm doing..." Thought Lamyia!

Chapter 3:
After a few days, Fatma went to France with her friends and Lamyia was alone with her parents, she felt bored at first but then thought of doing something fun before school starts.
"So what did you think of doing?" asked Shaima when they were together in Lamyia's room.
"I dunno, How about learning a language or a music instrument?" asked lamyia.
"Khaled knows how to play guitar! We can ask him to give us some lessons."
"You're kidding, right?"
"Why not?"
"Oh ok, but it's still the middle-east. We're not living in the USA".
She didn't like to be taught be a guy she didn't know.
"I'm not saying date him!"
"No way I'm going to learn guitar from him"
"Ok, How about learning Spanish or French? I really want to learn Spanish"
"I want to learn French, how about we teach each other what we have learned?"
"But I thought we could have more fun together, but that's ok, I'm in"

After couple of days, they started their courses, and Lamyia was having great fun, and she thought that one of the reasons for that is that she wasn't spending time with Shaima as much, because she thought that Shaima has changed somehow.
One day after they both finished their lesson, Shaima said, "Can I go home with you?"
"Yeah, sure"
They walked to Lamyia's place and entered Lamyia's room.
"Can I use your phone?" Shaima said.
"Of course, there you go" Lamyia said and handed the phone to her friend and then while Shaima was dailing the number, Lamyia thought of leaving her finish her phone call, so she said, "I'm really hungry, I'll go and get some thing to eat"
After few minutes, Lamyia retured to Shaima and they started eating, then Shaima said, "Aren't you going to ask who I called?"
"No, but if you want to tell me, go ahead" Lamyia answered.
"No, that's ok if you don't want to know"
"Ok cool"Lamyia thought: that was weird, who was this person that Shaima called and thought not to tell her about it, something smelled fishy.

Lamyia began noticing that Shaima started using Lamyia's phone a lot even though she has her own phone! Lamyia asked her once who was this person she was calling and sending messages to? But Shamia said, "You said you don't want to know"
And when Shaima left, Lamyia thought that person's number must be somewhere in the phone, so she looked for it and then she found it and then she sent a message saying, "Hey, What's up? How are you?"And after some minutes she got, "Hey baby, I'm good. U? cya"
Lamyia didn't know what to think, it could be anyone, she thought. And she decided to ask Shaima who was this person.

Chapter 4:
Next day, right before their lesson started, Lamyia said, "Just tell me who is he?"
"Who's he?" Shaima asked.
Lamyia didn't say anything back and gave Shaima a look that said: "I asked first"
"You really want to know?"
"Aha"
Shaima hesitated before speaking and then said, "Khaled"
Lamyia looked at Shaima without saying a word, she was shocked but she didn't make any facial expression and she took her book and entered the class room.
"But the lesson didn't begin yet" Shaima said.
Lamyia was calm, she didn't think about Shaima any more, she focused on the lesson and had fun.
I should've expected this from her, she's no different from the other girls, and I won't this get in my way on having fun, I just don't get the point of talking like that to any guy, what's the point? get married? yeah, right! Lamyia thought.

Next day, she talked to Shaima like nothing happened, but in the inside, a lot changed.
She doesn't feel the same way about Shaima.
"Don't act like nothing happened" Shaima said.
"It's your life! I've got nothing to do with that. I'm you friend, and your love life doesn't concern me. Just don't use my phone again please."
"Ok" Shaima said disappointed.

On the same day, Fatma returned from France with a lot to tell her family and she showed that a lot of photos in France.
And at night, Fatma entered lamyia's room and talked to her about the cute guys there and Lamyia practiced some French with her sister and then Lamyia received a message on her phone saying, "I'm really sorry for all of the trouble I've got you through, Khaled".
Fatma read the message with Lamyia and said, "Who's he?"
"Never mind him, he's the stupidest guy on the planet"
"I thought that was Tom Cruise".
Lamyia laughed and then explained that he was Shaima's boyfriend but she made Fatma swear not to tell anyone.

Chapter 5:
School started and Lamyia hanged with Samar more than with Shaima, they had so much fun together and Lamyia had more friends, and she was elected the "Class President" although she isn't so smart but she manages to have full marks at most of the exams.
One day, they had a free lesson at school and so the girls made great noise, Lamyia tried to make them stop making that noise but then she gave up and joined some girls their discussion.
"So what are you talking about?" Lamyia asked.
"Boys" one girl said.
"Ok, then I'll find another girls to talk to" Lamyia said and then gave them a wink and walked away.
They all laughed and they were never upset with her almost-rudeness but they all agreed that she had a good heart and she meant no harm.
"So what are you talking about?" she said joining another group of girls and hoping that their topic wasn't as stupid as the latter.
"Hypocrisy" One of the girls said.
"I'll tell you this about the difference between hypocrisy and being nice: if you don't like some people and they like you, you can't tell them that you don't like them, so you have to like spend some time with them, so you're forced to do that, because of how many times you've made excuses to try avoiding being with them. But those people I can't stand; I wouldn't hesitate to avoid them every time they approach but it got me into trouble"
"So you don't think we should be straight forward to everyone" said a girl.
"Then you can't go on living! You're not living alone, you have to compromise, it's not about being straight forward, it's about being honest with yourself which is more important, just know who you like and who you don't like and then act the way that suits you" Lamyia bowed after giving her speech and then said, "What a shame, no cameras around! This, my friends, doesn't happen everyday"

The bell rang announcing the end of the school day, and so everyone was rushing towards the gate, and Lamyia and Samar were waiting to be picked up by their families, and so Samar's dad came and picked the two of them because lamyia's dad couldn't come to pick her up because he was going to be late at work.
During the drive, Samar's dad said, "How was your school day?"
"Great, nice teachers, no homeworks, not tired at all" Samar said in a sarcastic tone.
"Yeah, no complains" Lamyia said.
"I didn't like school much either"
"Didn't like school? We hate it, not a slight "liking" involved in our feelings to school"
Lamyia got home and ate lunch, then slept for 3 hours and then woke up and studied and finished her homeworks and went to the kitchen and found out that her father just got home.
She drank some water then went to the living room and saw that the news was on t.v so she sat on the couch and watched some news, then she got so frustrated because of the news, so she decided to finish a project that should be finished next week but she thought that was better than watching news.
As she was about to finish, she thought; that'll be enough, I'll finish it later.
Her phone rang and it was Shaima and so she picked up.
"Hey Lamyia, what's up?"
"Nothing, just finished my homeworks"
"Great. So I saw that Samar and you became good friends"
"Yeah, you know how I mis-judge people" Lamyia said hoping that this phone call wouldn't be so long.
"You know I stopped talking to him" Shaima said. "I'll never talk to him again, you know, before anyone finds out"
"Oh yeah?" Lamyia said. "Like it's my business"
"Of course it is. You're my friend" Shaima said in an angry tone.
"I guess you should have thought better than using me in something you know I don't approve of"
"Is that all because I used your phone?"
"You know well that it isn't just that, by doing that you gave him my number, do you trust him fully? Do you think he wouldn't call me when you're not there? And you used my phone without telling me what you were doing, because you knew damn well that I wouldn't second what you did or to be more correct do!" Lamyia said without giving Shaima a chance to talk. "Ok now, glad I said everything I wanted to say, I don't think you have anything left unsaid, do you?"
"No, I don't. Good night"

Chapter 6:
Lamyia thought she may have been rude with Shaima but she didn't regret what she said because it was exactly what she was feeling.
After a few days, it was weekend, and Lamyia's family went out for lunch and then went to the movies and had fun and then they wanted to go home but Fatma said that she wanted to walk a little and then she and Lamyia will get home.
And during their walk, Fatma said, "I might get engaged in a month or so"
"Really?"
Fatma nodded.
"Congratulations, prince charming is actually waiting, Hisho is over there"
"Oh, don't call him that, I'll be back in a sec."
"Don't tell me that you set this up!"
"Well, if I told you that you wouldn't come with me"
"You know, if you aren't getting engaged, I'd go home and leave you alone and never talk to you"
"Wow! Then Thank God I am"Fatma went to Hisham, and Lamyia stood there for a while and then saw Khaled heading her way, and she looked around to find someone to save her from talking to him alone because she knew he had something to say to her.
She thought she saw Rami somewhere, so she looked again and saw him and went straight to him.
"I'm invisible" Rami said.
"No, you're not" Lamyia said, "Hey how are you?"
"Was good about a minute ago"
"Shut up, it's just I saw that Khaled dude heading my way so I prefered to come to you than talk to him alone"
"How do you know that he's coming to talk to you?"
"I'm a psychic"
And seconds later Khaled came and said hi and said that he wanted to have a word with Lamyia alone.
"Why?" Rami said giving him a stare.
"None of your business"
"What if I don't want to talk to you" Lamyia said.
"Then, I'll talk" Khaled said, "Why did you tell Shaima that I called you? when all I did was sending you a message"
"Doesn't make any difference" Lamyia said shocked that he was talking about this in front of Shaima's little brother and then Rami said, "Ok you said what you wanted to say now get lost".
Lamyia gave Rami a strange look, then he said, "Yeah, this lil' kid knows! I'm not that dump"
"You said it yourself" Lamyia said. wow! he's just 14 and he talked to that jerk like that, but he knows?! She thought
"Ok now, it's your turn to get lost" Rami said simling, "YES, I said it before you do, you're losing your magic"
"Yeah, alright, thanks. Cya".
Lamyia found her sister waiting for her, and then told her what happened. "I always liked that kid" Fatma said.
"Damn, he's now on just 'get a life', I am losing my magic"

no comment!!

2007-08-03T17:34:00.000+03:00

when will I ever choose?

2007-07-19T13:45:00.001+03:00

My sister has it all planned for our future, she says that she'll pay for our uni. expenses so she'll choose what we'll study, and we're always like: yeah right!so let me see my options and other options that might not be for me! as well!
An engineer: I don't think so, I don't like to be one!
A writer (as in going into English literature): I guess it was an option for me, I mean I like being a writer but I don't think I want to choose it as a career, and I'm not into English literature!
A lawyer: I don't think it's meant for me, I don't have that self-confindence to be one!
A pharmacist: I'm not into anything that is related with science!
A journalist: I enjoy to be the viewer of anything that has to do with media more!
A teacher: if you want me to hit kids and scream at them, but I can't say :"then I'll be one" because being a teacher would limit everything I do!!! I'm not saying that teaching is a horrible job, but that's what I think!
A doctor: NO FREAKING WAY! even if they'd kill me, I'd rather be dead than be a doctor!!!!!!Graphic design: what is this that all people seem to like now, and they're getting into it! I have no idea what it is, and I have no desire in becoming one!!
Politician: I like judging politicians without knowing what they do, and I'd like to keep it that way!

now you might think that I'm just eliminating all of my options! maybe that's what I'm doing, but I really want to get into something I like, so I don't know how it's going to turn out, maybe I'll find something that I like or I'll think about my options and try to fit something and come up with a decision even if it didn't happen anytime soon!so if I forgot any other majors that I might have forgotten, just tell me and I'll add them here!

Learning from people!! not going to happen!!!!! but maybe for you!

2007-07-13T01:32:00.000+03:00

I officially don't like her!! period. and that's irrelevent to what I'm going to say but I just had to say it!

difference is what makes us live with each other! because it makes us complete each other! We'd be bored if we wore the same, liked the same things, did everything the same way!

I'm not saying being the exact opposites! but it's the things that some of us do and makes us know new things, interesting things!

it's the way we live life! now, I don't like meeting people who really really strange habits and like really weird things!

but meeting people from different backgrounds really makes you open-minded! and makes you think out-side of the box, even if it was for a little while only!

leaning about people's traditions is very interesting! and hearing from people about different issues makes you see any issue from more than just one point of view!

It always helps me -only global matters or general matters, because peronal ones, I don't listen to anyone but myself-

I mean, it's really hard to find an objective media or news because all we see is Iraqi channels, because we can't handle not to watch the news and not anyone of us doing something bad to the t.v, because other broadcasting channels call terrorists other names that don't sound like their doing something wrong!!!

so listening to different people's opinions makes you look at anything from a different point of view, even if it doesn't make you change your opinion!

Why Do U wanna Know?

2007-06-22T00:34:00.000+03:00

one of the things that I'm glad that I suck at is being a 'suck-up', I can't flatter people neither do I want to.
and I hate it when I have to be with people I don't like. I watch my mouth so I don't say anything rude, but maybe something that they won't understand. :D
I tottaly love making inside jokes when Noor's around, great fun.
and again I'm talking about random things.
it's countigous!!
ok so I was talking to a girl and from the beginning I didn't like her (online of course) and then she said: "I want to ask you something personal if that's ok?" so I said: "ok"
I thought of the questions that she might ask but what she said wasn't what anything I thought it would be. she said: "are you a sunna or a shia'' and i was like: "Why would you want to know, I mean I'm a muslim and that's what matters" and she was like: "ok I got it" so I asked her the same question she did, so that should be no problem for her because she asked that question to me and she should answer herself. so she said -in Arabic she said all that so this is me translating:P-: "oh ok, I know what you are now.. and I'm the opposite of what you are" :O :O
so I was like: "how did you know what you knew? and what did you know?"
I wanted to know if she was right or wrong but she was right. but I didn't tell her that she's *write* or wrong -sorry, again I couldn't resist another chance to mock-
I mean what's this with Arab people just because I'm Iraqi then they want to know if *what kind of muslim I am*
it's sick I have to admit!!!! and people who ask that question should be ashamed of themselves!!
I have been asked a lot of times that question but we were taught not to answer, because we're muslims and if people knew that then no need for more details that won't make any difference, although now it may does to other people.
I actually had a fight with my friend over this, and I we talked about this a lot and then never got back to the topic again and agreed that we want to still be friends although now we're on a mission to find a life that doesn't include each other in it and see who wins, and it lasts for 2 weeks, 1 week left, you'll see the results on our blogs..
ok now that's enough.. too much infos as usual.. no worries..
*bye blogs* :P :P

total randomness

2007-06-21T23:21:00.000+03:00

"hey blog"
-couldn't resist this chance to mock-

Hating: lotion stuff.

Tamer 3ashour and 3mr Moustafa simply ROCK!!!

and this blog post is not for you to understand. don't worry it's just because you don't live with me. :P

Mocking is my life

2007-06-07T22:38:00.000+03:00

I love mocking.. It's sooo rocking :P

but hey I know when to stop :P

GOOD SONGS.. give them a listen

2007-06-07T22:01:00.000+03:00

"what chu know bout me what chu what chu know?" Lip Gloss- Lil' mama
"Some sort of window to your right, As he goes left and you stay right" How to Save A Life- The Fray
"Do you know what it feels like to be the last one to the know the lock on the door has changed" Do You Know- Enrique Iglesias
"Still harder, getting up, getting dressed, living with this regret" What hurts the most- Rascal Flatts
"A few hours left 'til the sun's gonna rise, tomorrow will come and it's time to realize, our love is finished forever" Just One Last Dance- Sarah Conner
"I need your grace, to remind me to find my own" Chasing Cars- Snow Patrol
"Don't you worry about the distance I'm right there if you get lonely Give this song another listen, Close your eyes Listen to my voice it's my disguise.. I'm by your side" Hey There Delilah- Plain White T's
"Told you I'll be here forever That I'll always be your friend, Took an oath Imma stick it out 'till the end" Umbrella- Rihanna Feat. Jay-Z
"And all I need is you, Come please I'm calling. And oh, I scream for you..Hurry I'm falling, I'm falling, I'm falling" Saving Me- Nickelback

so many songs I have just found about, they're sooooooo good.. Thanks Ash for 'Saving me'.. and Thanks Medha for mentioning 'Do You Know'.. Thanks Zach and Jenny for 'How to Save A life' and 'Chasing Cars'
PLEASE people, if you have any songs you like and want me to listen to them, tell me about them and I'll listen to them.. :D
there's nothing like listening to good music :)

A victim of circumstances or a victim of apathy???*

2007-06-05T11:17:00.000+03:00

It is perhaps every teenagers dream to holiday in bali and shop in dubai. It is perhaps every software engineer's routine to party in places where a glass of vodka costs more than three meals for an entire family. It is perhaps every 17 year old boy's hobby to go to a shopping mall, look at beautifull women and thank God for making life so much more worthwhile. It is perhaps quite okay for a father to buy his son a Mitsubushi Pajero for passing 10th grade, while on the other hand money is being saved by cutting down on the salary of the housemaid. But while we are engrossed in our most serious ventures, we should perhaps step out of our own shoes and see those things that we ought to see, to hear those things that we ought to hear, to stay silent and think about what we really have to speak about.
I am writing here fully aware of the cruel ironies and sorrowfull contradictions in the world today. We live in a society that plays on a see saw not caring enough to see if the person on the other end is heavy enough to balance the apparatus. We live in a not so condusive atomosphere where luxuries are no longer enough but instead an ambition to go beyond is visible. Yet on the other lie people who are troubled by the voice within, who cry and scream on the inside watching a poor soul's hope lies on the edge of a cliff and yet cant do anything to help.
Death represents to most of us that evil force that will take us away from everything and everyone we love and cherish while for her it is perhaps a source of liberation, freedom from responsibilities that burden her back and strike her down, end of a punishment called life
While we fight our battles against boredom, against mediocrity and against simplicity as opposed to vulgar extravagance, she fights a battle for food and shelter she fights a drunken husband and for good education which her children rightly deserve. While a kitchen knife to us, represents all those times we have hurt ourselves trying to chop vegetables, it reminds her of the day she came to her employers home shocked and not knowing where to go with the knife thrust into her back, by the very person who was supposed to love and protect her.
While a good convent school represents to us affordable means of good education and money worth spending on, for her it represents an agent of financial burden and yet at the same time the right place for her brilliant daughter. It represents a situation where it is less food today and more money tomorrow or enough food today and a hopeless future tomorrow.It is true that she and I are from different sides of society. Yet her greatness and resilience is beyond anything I have ever seen.
I stand here with the hope that her honesty is not rewarded with misery and sorrow; that her sincerity is not returned with starvation; that her nobility and integrity doesnt bring a drunken mad man whose only motivation is alchohol.
Yet I also realise that hope isnt enough and neither is Rs.4000/- as fees for 10th grade. Gratitude has lost is meaning and concern signifies guilt and frustration. I stand here at the face of a society that is over eating and obese and yet refuses to share, at a government that continuously fights over our language and yet doesnt listen to the people who speak that language.
I am also aware that words are not enough. Heck they may even discredit me as the person who only speaks and doesnt actually do anything. Yet it is with the hope that someone will listen and someone will listen good that I am here. I am here not telling a story about a individual but about a host of maids in Bangalore who fight drunken husbands, increasing costs of education and narrow minded employers and the apathy of society. This is the story of a housemaid whose drunken husband is absconding at the time of paying fees for the daughter’s term at school. This is the story of the housemaid whose drunker husband has drained her of all the money she needs for a cataract operation. This is the story of those millions of people who clean the houses of people they don’t know, ensure the family’s good health by tidying up the place and are yet ill treated as outcastes and cheap labour.
I stand here lost in a different way thinking and pondering and still not able to understand anything. I would prefer my intellect to stay idle than to live with the frustration that I wasnt able to figure out another way, my eyes would rather prefer to be blind than see a soul lose its hope near the cliff and still not be able to do anything, my ears would prefer to be deaf than listen to the cries of those who need help and still feel helpless, my mouth would rather prefer to be dumb than say things and not be able to do anything promised. Justice and equity seem more like concepts on paper than operative words in today's world. They say that God is like a lawyer, i.e both are approached only when people can’t think of a way out and I would say I am also such a stereotype.
To all those teenagers who own pajeros for passing 10th grade, who party at “The Capitol” spending more on booze than people could afford on proper food, I would like to say that a world exists parallel to ours and it is suffocating and it cries for help. It struggles to keep its residents alive and begs for someone to intervene. If you are a person to whom things beyond luxuries are a necessity, for whom comforts are more of a right than a privilege and for whom drugs and cigarettes are worth buying, then it is only fair that I wish you the best of luck.
But as V puts it in his speech in V for Vendetta, if you see what I see, if you feel as I feel and if you seek as I seek, then please post this article on your blogs and spread this to every blogger you know for more the speakers, more will be listeners.

*This is written by Ash: http://ashinbangalore.blogspot.com/2007/05/victim-of-circumstances-or-victim-of.html

Our Friends

2007-05-11T18:19:00.000+03:00

one of the privileges of being twins, is that we get to have the same friends and not only offline friends, here's something for our online friends:

Laura: She's such a sweet girl, very caring... and she wants to change this world for the better.. and we're proud that she's a friend of ours... we hope you find what you want in this life.
Evil_slayer -Boody-: a great person.. very funny.. and he's one of those people who will change this world starting from his country.. keep it up;)
Saudamini: She's such a 'sweetie' and she's our source of Indian music.. always great fun talking to her.. all the best..
Ash: one of us is going to kill him and the other one, he's relying on to save him.. a great friend.. we're lucky to know him..
Bhishma: He's very cool and doesn't know who's who.. he just says:'you sure you're Huda or Noor?' out of nowhere in the conversation.. and we love talking to him..
Zach -our boss-: can't ask for a better boss... so much fun talking to him.. we'll rock the world together.. you're an inspiration to all of us.. and you're dedication motivates us..
Rohit: can't believe how much he knows.. we're both huge fans.. keep rocking..
Medha: We have fun every time we talk to her.. we love you and just know we're there..
Waed: a great great friend.. she's such a cool nerd.. waiting to see her again.. all the best
Rux: she's so much fun.. and soo sweet.. always ready to give you an advice.. luv ya
Anu -AA-: one of the brightest people alive.. we love replying to her posts and learning about India from her.. she's a true compulsive thinker.. we're waiting for her to be our tour guide in India..
Fathi: instead of asking us 'how are you' he says: 'had your lunch? and what did you have' he'll know how we are from those questions.. he's an awesome friend.. you're invited anytime to come and have lunch with us and taste mom's cooking.. have fun at the gym:P
Amy: can't ask for a cooler friend.. and she's so talkative.. love talking to you..
Sharu & Aska: they're very cool ... can't wish you anything but the very best..

PS: we wrote this in a jumble order.. :D

This is posted by N&H

random updates

2007-05-02T20:55:00.000+03:00

I have this habit when I'm angry, I walk like I'm going to fight with someone.. It's freaky, even if the reason that I'm mad about is silly... but that walk is scary for other people but I like it..
and I also have this weird/scary stare at the person I'm mad at.. people can say sorry even if they didn't do anything.. but just getting face to face with them and giving them that look just lets my anger out..
and now there's this new habit when someone comes or I'm saying hi to someone or I just see someone I know, I raise my eyebrows with my face and it's like hi if I don't want to say hi to someone, so with that little nod, I get myself out of this hi/hello/how are you/how are things with you??
and I let them know that I saw them..
and there are also some friends that I'm annoying them, one about her yellow shoes and the other one about her weird laugh and one about her flat face -always make fun of it when she's not around- and one about her family-size lips...
and also having those fun fights with my friend's brother who's totally scared of me..
and without forgetting the new update to the mock-at-people list: Miss India who's beautifull :P
and that was my random updates on my habits and what's cracking down!!
but one thing before I click 'publish' I have to say something to someone:
'You just get a grip and chill out and bala zana5a... and get a life'
I feel sooooo much better now...

Medical school?

2007-04-19T14:52:00.000+03:00

I don't know why here in the middle east, they have a thing for med. school.. a big thing actually.
And all must get into med. school, whether it's what they really want or if they're smart enough or they have what it takes for med. school..
I have been shocked by a friend of mine when I saw their application for grade-12 that had: the major you want to get into for university and the answer was: medical school... and I was soooo shocked that she wanted to get into med. school. I know her for almost 2 years and I know that she doesn't have what it takes to med. school.. and I know that it came from that obsession Arabs -I don't know if others have that thing for med. school also- have about med. school, they think that being a doctor is incomparable to any other job and one has respect by just being a doctor.. -no offence to any doc.-
People should go after what they want and what they are good at, because they're going to be -whatever they choose to be- a doctor/an engineer/ an artist/ etc. etc. etc. their whole life, unless they changed it in somehow. so they should consider their options and think about what they really want not what people want them to be and if you're honest about anything then you'll prove yourself wherever you are and whatever you do.. and that is exactly what I'm going to do when I choose what I want to get into at university.
and that made me think, seeing that application of my friend, there are other majors other than getting into med. school and one must follow what they're good at and what they like, and that also made me think of the poor people she's going to treat or how she will feel if she didn't make it and survive because one must have some specific qualities to get into med. school -I'm sure a lot will nod reading this-
but I didn't even bother to talk to her about it or tell her what I think because it's her life and her future and I just asked: 'you want to get into med. school?' and she said: 'yes' and that was it with her....
Now, I haven't decided what I want to get into at uni. or what do I want to be in the future but I have a clear idea of what I don't want to get into and that is medical school, I think med. school isn't for people like me and it's not something that I want to become which is being a doctor...
if you want to get into med. school then I have nothing to do with it, you're so free in getting into what you want and if you have what it takes for it then you totally got my respect because maybe you someday will treat me or maybe not..

bug off!!!!!

2007-04-12T00:40:00.000+03:00

I don't like telling everything that happens to me to everyone.. not that I am mysterious, neither do I claim to be and I don't not want to be one!!!
I don't care and that's a fact but this is not what I'm going to talk about.. I have talked about me when it comes to this but let me talk about people when it comes to that issue..
let me start by talking about some things about me and then how people react or act in general..
it's true that I don't like to talk much but that is only at few places or times.. I can be soooo talkative and I can be really quite..
but I don't like to spread things about me everywhere only to the people that care about me but that is kind of impossible having someone around that their mouth can't shut up and if they finished talking about what happened to them then they'll start talking what happened to me... *no offence*
Now, it's their -should I stop saying 'them, they, their?- nature and this is not what I wanted to talk about but no harm in mentioning it.
I don't know why people want to know everything about everyone.. -that is not all people but a lot of them- and some of them, you don't know them well... so it's irritating when they ask about what happened... and you can't just tell them I don't want to say.. although we have tried: it's not going to do you no good if you found out or it's none of your business or why do you want to know,, etc.
Some are just too curious and I can't understand why they are so.. sometimes when they ask me something I just remain silent and sometimes they give up and after some minutes I answer with a tone that is like whatever...
just mind your own business and leave me alone!!!!

letting it out

2007-03-21T22:17:00.000+03:00

This is not a comfortable place right now. It may be my enemy.. I no longer type these words easily as I did before. but did I really wrote blogs easily in the past?
I'm talking like I have been writing in here since ages... I'm talking like I know what I'm talking about.
this blog may be my enemy?? What a line!!!! It's non-sense. and it sounded like it's coming out from a crazy person whom doesn't know anything at this moment.
I have learned or promised myself that I wouldn't write in here when I'm down or mad or feeling blue, so regrets won't take place in me. I have enough regrets in this life.
So why I'm breaking my promise this time -it is obvious that I'm feeling blue- ??
well, I'm not going to write about why I'm feeling blue? neither am I going to write about what's bothering me or what happened?
It's just a wish to type 'I'm not feeling good at this moment' and tell the truth for the first time in this day.
When people ask how are you? I would say: not bad, good, I'm the same, ...
I don't say I'm great or I'm sad, feeling blue.
It's just no use of saying that to other people, they already have tonnes of problems and you need not worry them about matters that will go away.
So still why am I saying all of this if I don't want to upset anyone? I'm not going to upset anyone because after saying this I'll feel better. so you don't need to worry about me.
I'm doing much better now... as I'm writing this now.
Now I'm done with this for now, I let it out and I'm good....
thanks for listening -or should I say reading-

(not) my love life to come

2007-03-08T18:36:00.000+03:00

My real love fairy tale that's going to happen to me. -that I believe it's going to happen to me-
After a lot of years waiting and dreaming about my perfect man for me....
He'll come and my perfect man will be him, I'll fit him in that category.
I'll love him truly and he'll know my deep love for him, then I don't know what will happen, whether he'll love me back or not. But that's not important because he'll know that I love him.
I may differ with people when they tell me that you'll love someone and you'll hurt a lot, and you'll love the wrong person. But here, he can't be the wrong person, because he's going to be perfect for me.
and after sometime, he'll love me or he won't, it's never going to be the problem.
but you may ask why? and you have every right to ask, why I'm not making it a big deal for someone I love, that he doesn't love me?
So why? I'm going to make the confused look go away, but I won't promise that your next look will be good. I'm sorry that I won't put a smile on your face, but it's reality.
I'm being like the someone wants to tell you something and keeps saying reasons and facts and excuses before telling you what it is.
please don't hate me but I'm not making you wait for the happy news or the good news...
ok, it's time to tell you what will happen with me....
if he loves me or not won't matter, because even if he did, something will come up in our way, and will destroy our plans that we made together if we made ones.
It may be our families, money, traditions, maybe even religion. Who knows? but something will make all of our plans, but that's if he loved me. Because if he didn't then we won't have plans.
and in both ways, this following will happen...
A guy will come and I'll marry him, he won't be very charming, neither he will be what I have dreamt of years back, because whom I have dreamt of went away for reasons I have mentioned earlier.
and I will live my life and try to be happy.
*************
Now, I'm not saying that this will happen to me, -God,NO- but I like the thought of this, not like but I enjoy thinking like this.... It sounds like a drama soap.....
I know God have better plans for me.... but those aren't my plans for myself because such plans cannot be planned for, they just happen and I hope that this won't happen to me...

an unofficial 15

2007-03-06T19:10:00.000+03:00

I'm not 15 yet, although it's a matter of days and I'll be 15. so now if I kept saying now: I'm 14. and then at 17/3 I'll say: I'm 15. amazing how only few days can be counted as a year. but I believe that it's not those few days who turned me into 15. it's by the things that made me 15. from now I'm saying that I'm 15 because I feel like it. although I have Noor saying: We're 14, stop saying we're 15. But I believe that I am 15, that age which I'm no longer considered a kiddo or considered at my early teenage life. I'm a true teenager now -or I like to think that I am-.
I hope I'm making sense or at least I'm going to make sense. I hope I'm not like the song that I was listening to, but the problem wasn't with the song, it was with the program, so it was like: In My, my my my dream, there's there's only you you you no...." and I gave up hope on it and closed it, so a true prayer that this isn't like the song I listened to.
I already feel I'm 15, talk, walk, eat, sleep, do everything like someone who's been in this life for 15 years.
15 is like any year you become, but it's different in what you want to do, learn in this year. How am I going to be 15 or acting like one? nothing new or different, it's the way you see the world and the way you react which is the only different thing that changes from one year to another.
It is I who is going to decide all those things, it's I who will be living as a 15 years old girl who have been through more than she should go through but still she'll living and she has some respect left for this life. That some respect may go away through these years that are left for me to live.
I'm not being pessimist but it's the truth and nothing but the truth.
In this new chapter of my life which isn't a chapter because being in the same place, doing the same things, make me in the same chapter I was in, so I shouldn't say a new 'chapter' but it is a new 'way' of seeing things.
I'm muture, I should keep reminding myself that I am at some extent, muture, but I seem to forget that fact and then a lot of nasty things follow...
'Life still unseen' not true. 'Life still uncovered' half true. No life will be complete, we'll all try to do so, even though we all know we're not going to complete it but it's if you try or not that counts not if you achieve what you've tried to do.
So I'm at the door waiting for 15 to arrive, although I feel like it's already here. But it might only take few days until it arrives and I can say: I'm 15. and I mean it more than I do now.
'An end is a start for a new beggining'.... so long 14 and hello 15...

DON'T

2007-03-02T19:17:00.000+03:00

If you have lived around me for a time, you'd know that I have this habit of blaming everyone around me, even though sometimes it can be my fault but I blame anyone for anything.
so here I have some people to blame. They are all the people who live with me and around me and all the people I know and I blame all the things that are around me.
so now I blamed who I need to blame but still I haven't said what I blame them for:
Inspiration, it left me without coming back to me. So you must think that I should blame 'Inspiration' for it but let me explain:
I'm inspired by things that don't happen, I'm inspired by people I haven't met, by books I haven't read, by words that haven't been said.
So therefore I need people to keep quite, I need my life to be empty for a while so I can have that inspiration.
People, don't come to me anymore, don't talk with me, don't and don't.
Words, don't enter my head, don't let me say you, don't and don't.
Books, don't let me read you, don't let me understand you, don't and don't.
You, don't comment on this.
It is not me who lead people, I may have said things that might sound controlling, but life taught me to be led more than to lead. So I just took that chance to blame and boss things/people around.
I have enjoyed it and there you go, I'm done.

a cool school day

2007-02-24T19:51:00.000+03:00

believe it or not, it was fun. We had fun. or more likely I did have a lot of fun.
I woke up with a good mood and if you know me then you would know that what I feel when I wake up reflects the way I spend my day. although I had a nightmare. I dreamt that I was out in the dawn walking on the high way. and there were people in a car with a yellow face man -don't ask- and then when I walked near them , the car started moving and I was running fast. and that was my nightmare and that nightmare didn't affect my mood -thank God- and so I was happy the whole day and making silly comments every where and actualy laughing at them -only me.
At school there was a celebration on the teacher's day -although I don't think it's today, but who cares?- so they were giving prizes to the teachers but the bad part is that we stood in the front so everything we did was noticable -meaning: no comments on the teachers we don't like- but though we clapped for the teachers we like and the ones that I didn't even know I clapped and said: who?
and my favourite teacher -who taught us two years ago- wasn't there and when they said her name, I wanted to scream and cheer for her, but I don't love her that much it's ok.
when the celebration took place, Noor noticed that all maths teachers wore the same thing, it was funny and cool, and very weird. Finally teachers in uniform.
and we didn't take our 1st period!
Then at our seventh period, we had maths and we were bored and we didn't want to be taught anything so we wanted to destract the teacher from our lesson and we tried in every way but we had our lesson and she gave us some questions to answer but some girls didn't know the answer so she siad:'how come you still don't know how to answer this, we took more than 70 practise questions on this' and because I was so bored I started counting and then Noor told me:stop. and I looked up and so some girls staring and laughing with me and one of them said: the teacher is mistaken with the number.
then we had our 2nd break and when we got back to our class we started talking about Saddam and I got so mad -in a good way, for me. I'm sure not for them- they like him and I have no idea why. He didn't do anything for them but they like him and they think he died in the name of islam and I had fun talking about this because I'm right and I know it, so I got my anger out in a healthy way -I think- and actualy convinced some girls that he's not GOOD.
so this my friends was my cool school day.

stop asking those questions

2007-02-21T19:25:00.000+03:00

Do you feel each other when you're not together? No
if one of you is sick will the other get sick too and feel each other's pain? well, because we're always together so we contage each other.
Who was born first? we don't know -the nurse who was supposed to number us forgot the little not important thing so it's all her fault-
Do you think about the same things? not necessarily
How is like having a twin sister? it's kinda cool but not so much! you have no privacy, you have no secrets, you cannot do stupid things and not be caught
I always wanted to have a twin sister? I'm sure you don't.
oh, is it that bad? not so much but it's not glamours. You get noticed everywhere. which is a bad thing.
Do you fight a lot? yes -but it's non of your business-
What will happen if you wanted to get married? we won't marry twin brothers!!!!!!!!
Who is smarter? both -but the truth is it's Noor-
You won't believe these facts about us:
we dream sometimes about the same people.
we say the same things always.
we are totally different.
oh really? -in not believing much in what we just said, like we care-
Does your family know who's Huda from Noor? -What a stupid question but we get that a lot- of course they do! almost 15 years with us.
How can you tell the difference? -we get that from the people who just met us- well, Huda's taller, Noor's thinner, Huda got a scar on her chin,..... -then we just say what the heck? they won't know who's Huda and who's Noor the next day-
Ever fooled people that you're Noor or her as in you? well, when we went to Iraq, we were at our aunt's house and people were coming to see us and mom was out, so we had to go and say hi and I didn't want to go, so Noor went to them twice -we were dressed in the same outfit- so they thought that they saw both of us and my aunt actually didn't find out until we told her -we didn't do that a lot, just few times-

guys, can't live with them! period.

2007-02-21T18:56:00.000+03:00

It is globally known that I don't like guys at all! In fact, I don't stand them. There maybe various reasons for that, maybe all the guys I know are jerks, or maybe a guy did something to me and so I had that against all guys! I don't know. Because all of the reasons I mentioned don't apply on me! The reason doesn't matter now!
Guys seem to want me to keep that attitude against them because time after time I see guys doing horrible things, like yesterday a guy I kinda knew was with his 7-8 year old brother who just came back from school and he was hitting a girl who was older than him and his older brother was on a bike and he supported his brother and with his bike almost ran over that girl and she fighting back but against two boys, she had no chance, so as we watched that we knew we had to do something, so we went there and told her to walk away and leave them! I must say that this isn't what I wanted to do, I wanted to go after him and scream at him and .... and ..... but I was going home from school although I was so in the mood for it but I didn't want to make a scene so we got that girl and then walked home!
now that kinda guy who was supporting his young brother in doing so, what will that little kid be in the future? a horrible thought! I wish not to think of it because it's a chain and I don't want to give up that little hope on the guys left on this earth.
and just saying anything about a guy, he'll just assume that you like him or something like that even if what you said: you suck! but he'll say: oh I know you think about me all the time!
funny how that ego of some guys can be so wrong but they still keep it and use it everywhere like we have nothing to do except thinking about them!
I know that there can be good guys out there in this earth but I'm not going to apologise for what I have said and I'm not generalizing this on all guys but I'm sorry to say is that I don't like guys, and I'm sure a lot of guys while reading this will be devastated by this but this is the truth! I'm not sorry!

a funny day

2007-02-16T14:15:00.000+03:00

I had something against eating out! I wasn't comfortable eating in front of strangers. My friends and my sister tried to convince me that it's ok! and I didn't care about what others thought of me but I don't know why I wasn't comfortable eating out! I used to eat with a tissue covering my whole mouth and tried to eat slowly and if someone was staring or just looking at me then I would stop eating for a moment! but then I don't care anymore how I eat when I'm out, so I it's ok eating out now! and the other day I was eating and there was someone staring -not at me I'm sure- at the sandwich I was eating, so I got a little uncomfortable and wished if he would find something else to stare at and leave me enjoy my sandwich, then finally he grabbed his mobile and stopped staring and I got back to my sandwich but I wondered what have I done to make someone stare at me, I wasn't doing anything crazy. But there was this women who was screaming -not screaming but talking VERY LOUD- so I couldn't help but to stare at her and left everything else but then her husband noticed that I was staring so I stopped staring, so maybe this is why someone stared at me because I stared -for a long time- at someone else.
and I must mention that before I got my order I pointed at my sister and someone else thought I was pointing at him but then somehow -thank God- he got that I was pointing at the one behind him. and my other sister some time later pointed at me and I got up and went there but someone was with us and thought she was pointing at her so she also went and that time was full of mistakes! -I'll spare you-
and at the way home we all were going through some situation but Noor seemed to have it more than anyone of us! and I kept laughing and laughing and couldn't stop and my dad was making it more hard to stop laughing by making funny comments and Noor kept saying: please stop laughing. and then she would laugh with me. After every 5 minutes I'd remember it and laugh and when we arrived I couldn't help but to laugh loud and Noor.........
I can't mention the situation we had because it would be really improper.

stupid lines from songs

2007-02-14T00:59:00.000+03:00

Although I don’t correct things and if there was a mistake somewhere I wouldn’t correct it. But if something was wrong, I’d say it out loud even if though I may not say it to the person who did that thing.
So here are some of the things that I consider really wrong in some of the songs:
1- ‘I was born to make you happy’ a song by Britney Spears and by that name I can tell you what’s wrong –and I have listened to the song–.
You were born to make someone happy? How silly is that? You’re purpose in life is to make that person you love happy? And you weren’t born to make a difference in someone’s life or you weren’t born to just live your life and enjoy it. I know that may sound selfish but it’s not, you weren’t born for someone else.
I have always wondered why I’m here in life and I was still wondering but now I found the whole reason of me being on this planet which is to make ‘you’ happy.

2- ‘Goodbye my lover’ a song by James Blunt.
And this time it’s not the name, it’s the part where he says: ‘shared your dreams, shared your bed’! how can someone share your dreams! Aren’t we all supposed to have our own dreams and ‘everyone share their dreams’? well, maybe you can do that! But I don’t know how! And ‘shared your bed’ I’m sorry to say this but it’s just sick! I know it’s a song but first of all: there’s no point of saying that. Second of all: the line is so stupid. Third of all: we are so better off not knowing that!

3- ‘ahla haga fiki’ a song by Mohammed Hamakey.
The part I don’t like is: ‘inshallah amot fi howaky inshallah’ (meaning: inshallah I’ll die in your love) do you really want to die in someone’s love? You know this is also just a song but death isn’t that easy! You can’t just wish that you’ll die in someone’s love! Actually the song isn’t that he’s wishing to die but it’s that if he dies, he wants to die in her love. But still it’s stupid. And to us Muslims, you can’t just say that! And I’m sure he doesn’t really want that! Cause if someone asked him about that he’ll immediately say: ‘No, of course not. It’s just a song. And of course I want to die surrounded by the people I love…… but you know, death is a very sad subject to talk about. Let’s change the subject’ or something like that.
So how can you sing a song that you don’t mean anything in it?

4- ‘If everyone cared’ a song by Nickelback.
It’s ‘if everyone shared and swallowed their pride’ I don’t get it. If someone is humiliated, so he/she should just move on and suck it up and continue like nothing happened! Of course not, they should stand up for themselves because no one has any right to humiliate anyone and by moving on and saying nothing when someone humiliates you, you’d be giving them all the right to humiliate you!
And pride is one of the things that are so important to me in life –I’m sure to others too– so I won’t swallow my pride! NEVER!

Now I’m sure there’s a lot of stupid songs in this world! But I’m mentioning those lines because all the songs that I mentioned aren’t supposed to be stupid!

Little kids

2007-02-09T18:34:00.000+03:00

A small girl was staring at something and she was standing close to me and I was with a friend and my sister. And they knew how I feel about little kids so they knew I was going to freak her out. They tried to talk me out of it but they let me and wanted to know what I was going to do. I looked at the little girl and caught her intention. I said to her: 'come here' with a smile and I expected the same reaction from her as all little kids have but she surprised me and she laughed and nodded with her head and turned the other way and left. I was shocked, I thought she'd have the confused look on her face and leave right away. but she didn't have that. she mocked me. and she's about 4-5 years old but she did a very smart thing to me and I was impressed.

I guess now not all little kids can be fooled. They are few genius ones that you know they'll be something in the future. This little girl will be a great person I'm sure. I have never laughed when someone mocked me neither did I ever enjoyed someone mocking me. But she was wicked.

I remember once at school, I saw group of 10-11 years old girls sitting together, so I went to them and I asked them questions: what's your name? In which class are you? and so on. They were looking at each other and they were giggling and my class mates saw me and they were watching from upstairs and laughing and making comments, then I had enough with those little girls so I said good-bye and returned to my class.

in every time when I'm around little children can't help but keep wondering: will life make them go through the hard way? the way that we all walked through and we're still walking, wondering what life has in stores for us.

and will life give them its pleasures, or will it just keep them in misery?
sometimes I want to warn them about life and that you can never expect the things that are hidden for you, but I don't think that they will understand and I don't think that they deserve to be warned, they just need to worry about nothing and live their simple short life until that simplicity goes away and then life changes its way with them.

although I cannot stand little kids but their innocence gets into me every time and they're absolutely irresponsible about everything that is going in their lives.

just a minute

2007-02-08T21:14:00.000+03:00

Iraqi people came over and at first I wasn't too happy about it and then they came and actually it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. mom and two other ladies talked together and my sisters and two other girls also talked together. and I was the listener of the old ladies talk. They talked about the situation in Iraq and how it was in the old days and then I found myself wishing for a minute in Iraq, just to breathe that air again and just get the feeling of being at home again! I was sure that a minute won't do but I was just asking for a minute. I wouldn't be like one of those addictive people who say when they want to quit something: ''just a little bit to get me through this''. No, a minute would be enough. I just want to know how it's like to be home.and then, I got to reality and those old ladies kept talking and they reached the ugly part of their conversation which is the situation of Iraq now. I wanted to go away. I didn't want to hear anymore. I just wanted to dream about that one minute in my home.But I couldn't get away and I also couldn't talk with the girls because they were away and two things were left to do: whether I'd listen to them or I'd watch that silly show that I don't even know the name of it. so I chose to listen to them. and they kept talking and talking and then they started telling stories about how cruel the situation was. and here is a story that a lady told us:A family had a very good guy and he was doing his PG. and so one of the gangs in there kidnapped him and told his family that they want 5000 dollar. They usually ask for more but I don't why it was just 5000 but still it's a big number for Iraqi families who -God knows- if someone was working in this family. and then they somehow gathered that money and then the gang -or should I say terrorists- called them back and told them if they don't pay then they'll find their son in the rubbish behind their town. So they went at the place that the gang chose and gave them money but they -of course- didn't give them their son back. They threw it at a rubbish after they beated him and a poor man who was searching to find if there was anything in that rubbish, so he found that guy and he was still breathing. So he took him to the hospital and they treated him but meanwhile his family gave up and they believed that he was dead.So after he recovered he called his family and they got him. but the tricky part is that he knew who kidnapped him, it was their neighbours because two men took him and they didn't hide their faces. So that family directly moved from their house and that guy went to Saudi Arabia.So then I didn't know what I felt anymore. I truly believed that the situation cannot be worse than this but I'm still holding on that wish. Just a minute anywhere in Iraq.I just want to feel for a minute that I'm where I belong and I'm free. and I want to feel like I'm safe there even though I cannot feel that with all what's going on there. but what I mean is being safe as in this is my place I have every right to be here.

smiley faces

2007-02-07T16:57:00.000+03:00

I opened my photo album, wanting a glimpse at the past. So by turning a page after page I noticed all the photos had smiley faces, there was: a crying smile, a happy smile, a simple smile, a sad smile, a cheesy smile, a silly smile, and all different kind of smiles.
And I kept turning pages and I kept seeing smiles, it became ridicules. Because I thought where are the real life expressions but then I found out –don't know how– that this was an album nothing more, not a life. So whenever someone takes a photo they smile, it became a style.
I also wondered what if I was sad, I would have to put a smile on, not because I have to, no. but because I want to see myself later, I'd rather see myself smiling.
So it doesn't really mean that I'm happy whenever I smile. And it also doesn't necessarily have to mean that I'm sad whenever I cry.
I cry sometimes out of joy, sadness, disappointment, and sometimes for no reason. So I can't assume that someone is happy just because a smile is always on on their faces.
When I was younger I wondered how can people smile when they're hurt, but after some years of life I began to understand how people do that and I found two reasons why they do that: whether they don't want people to worry about their problems –which I admire them but sometimes they need to show what they feel– or they just want to be mysterious –which I don't understand that desire–
What I feel at any moment always appear, if I want it or not, I can't hide what I feel –could be a bless, and could be a curse– and what I want to say at any moment comes out of my mouth without thinking. Yes, regret is always there. But if I should waste time by regretting then I wouldn't still have my nails on my fingers.
So I am what I am. And I don't always have that motto in life, it comes and goes.
And when I finished the album I was looking at, I found some embarrassing, some silly, some fun photos. And I remember a lot of things I almost forgot.
So now whenever I take a photo, I'd smile any kind of smile, just a smile that's what matters. And look at the camera and worry about nothing and with hope that it turns out to be a good photo.

Here I am

2007-02-05T17:43:00.000+03:00

Here I am! Alone sitting in my room, to be precise in my bed –where I haven’t slept nor sat on it in more than 2 days! It is giving me the courage to write and it somehow makes me believe in myself! Oh, how many times I have sat here and did everything, I wrote here -some great things came out of me in here-, I thought about everything and made a lot of decisions in here, I had m happiest and saddest moments in here, laughed, cried and did all of the things in here!
So to my bed, you were really an inspiration for me.
I have to say even though I did spend my best times in here but it is only because I had no place else. I wish I had spent it somewhere else with the same bed. No, I would never give it up unless I had to, and I think that time will come, but no worries cause I have memories in here and if I leave any place by memories then it doesn’t matter if I never come back to it again, because memories live with you no matter where you go.

Here I am! Listening to one of the things that I truly love. It gets me every time I know what it means but not everything in it except when I go to its lyrics! It’s in Hindi ‘Tere bin’. It is one of my favourites. I think it will always be! Cause the song you like, you get over them most of the them. But if the song is so good and you don’t listen to it always. And you have to have a mood to listen to it, then be sure it’s for all times. So thank who ever wrote the lyrics and composed it and to Atif and to the production company and to everyone participated in it! And I cannot forget, my dear friend who introduced me to it!

Here I am! Wearing my bracelets that are always in my hand –I rarely take them off–, I bought them from different places and now they seem best friends. I find that there’s something missing when I don’t wear them. It’s so weird how I can commit to things easily but so difficultly to people. I wear two bracelets on each hand. On the right hand: white and yellow with ‘live strong’ mark. And on the left hand: green and yellow, they used to have ‘friendship’ on them but because I’m wearing them on the daily, so the writings faded. So you must think ‘why is she saying that?’ but this is all because I want to give them their rights by mentioning them in here. And I got say that they mean a lot, and I attend to keep them as long as I live.

Here I am! Wearing my earrings that are always in my ears! I love them. They’re a present from my parents on my birthday. And I have a picture of my mom putting it in my ears. I have them from 6 years ago. And they are so dear to me. Whenever I touch my ears and feel that they’re there. I don’t know! But I feel satisfied and when I take them off and wear another earrings! I can’t wait to take them off and put my old ones. So I really admire them for keeping up with me all this time and they’ll always be with me even if I didn’t wear them.

Here I am! Reminiscing all the nights I slept holding my teady bear. And I think he’s one of my best friends. He knows all about me. He was a gift from my sister on the same birthday that I got my earrings and I also have a picture holding it for the first time. So thank you teady bear for living with me all these years and I think you wouldn’t mind living some more years with me. You’re really special to me! And no I’m not crazy! I’m sure everyone has their special dear things to them and I’m not ashamed of saying what are they and what they mean to me.

Here I am! Thinking about my dear pencil which I took from my father. I love writing with it. And I feel like I can write whatever I want with it. I have written almost all of my poems with it and it’s still there. Whenever I feel like writing, I just grab it and take a paper and write whatever I feel like writing. So the credit goes to this pencil for me writing my things. without it I don’t think that I would have written at all or keep writing, so thank you my pencil and I’ll never give you up. And I’m still not crazy.

Here I am! With my best friend sitting with me! She might talk nonsense and she might gets my horns out –and that’s just an expression of being really anger– and she might do all the things that I don’t like! But she’s my best friend in this whole world, not because I only know her, no, I know a lot but no one understands me like she does. She sometimes say: ‘you feel like….. right?’ and I didn’t know what was going on with me and I say ‘right’ and she surprises me a lot because I sometimes think that she knows me more than I know my self. So my best friend enjoy the moment! And I love you like I love myself.

Here I am, sitting by myself again. Thinking that I have mentioned only few things who came to my mind and I thought to appreciate them here. But I didn’t forget all the things that I appreciate in life but if pages were the sand in the deserts and if words were like the rain then I’d make it rain always on the desert and sit there and put words and sand together and I’ll do it over and over again and still I wouldn’t write enough about everything. So to everything that had happened to me and is happening to me now I just want you to know that I don’t forget what had made me who I am. And to all the people who are/were in my life I just want to thank you even if you did no good to me but I thank you because I never forget who make me know more about myself.
So I’d like to end this with this line:
‘How can I … and how can I be
When I’m just a person
and you’re just great...so how do you expect me to bewhen you're not feeling me.... ’

I must admit that I didn't forget a special friend of mine! or should I say was a friend of mine!Thank you my friend for hurting me, for making me feel like the world revolves around you, for every tear I cried because of you, for lying for your sake, for making me believe that you were guilty from everything that was happening to you, for making me feel worthless, for making me do things that I wouldn't do and you actualy made me feel like they were ok to do them, for making me give up on things that I believe in, for and for. I'm not dissing you on the internet. no I wouldn't do such thing. I have been a good friend to you, you said that I'm one of the best friends you had and you made me feel commited to you. I'm writing this because no one excpet one will know whom I'm talking about. and my friend won't read it. I'm sure she won't because she's not in my life anymore. so thank you my friend for all of the things you have done to me and I wish to you all the best in life even though this wish isn't from my heart but as long as you mean nothing to me, so I shall be sad no more. you're gone and for good.

It's a good Life

2007-02-03T15:37:00.000+03:00

I went through my life –not went but remembered- and searched through the memories I have, you might think that -according to my age- the things I have been through whether they’re not much or they’re silly! And believe me when I say you’re wrong! It always surprise me that every person on this earth has secretes, problems, burdens, ects.
And I always get surprised by how dark they all can be! Even though I have that but it’s not like that! I have been through a lot but there’s a lot ahead, there’s a lot on the journey of life!
God created a lot of great things on this earth but nothing surprise me and shocks me more that human being! So strong and so weak, so hard and so easy, so tough and so gentle, so fine and so ugly, so good and so bad, so and so,…
Just walking in a street and just passing people by -it only takes a minute to forget all the things we’ve been through by just thinking of people and what everyone is going through- makes life so wonderful and makes you feel so overwhelmed. And here I cannot help but to mention a line from a great song: ''we’ve never been so many and we’ve never been so alone"
And you think and think about others and their lives and everything that comes with that! You find yourself thinking from something to another without realizing.
And then you go back to your life. With everything you’ve been through and how did your life treated you. You find that all of that doesn’t matter because it’s your life and I’m sure if I’d be given the option of having another life but I’m sure I wouldn’t do it! I’d choose my life even if I could live a life that is the best life someone could ever have! But not me! Because being in my life makes me me! If I lived another life then I wouldn’t be me! I would be someone who just changed and have nothing to live for! Ok I have nothing to live for, no one to live for! But I have me! I’ll always have me! It’s the only one I’ll never lose!
You might think what she’s talking about? Is she crazy? But not when you’re reading! No! you’ll relate to this when you will! it comes and goes! It makes you respect your life for a change!
Just ask your self a question ‘is my life worth all that it made me go through?’
And I find myself wanting some more of those weird, embarrassing, strange, funny moments that life brings! Everyday comes with a surprise and ends with one! Remember everyday! Maybe you’ll be like what she’s talking about? Again! But if you really remember what happened and look closely!! You’ll find them! At least when I look closely and remember and my eyes go like: would you give us a rest?
But that also doesn’t happen everyday! But it does once in awhile!
So I’m enjoying the time of respecting my life! And after awhile! Probably when I wake up in the morning I’d lose the respect I have! And back to normal!
So maybe I’m a freak at the moment but I’m sure now hundred of people feel the same way! But the weird thing is that nothing happened today, well, a lot happened but non of them was able to give me all that! But I need to look closely to what happened today and stare more and find out what happened! It may not had happened to me but happened to someone around and made me like this! So thank you the-respect-giving-to-life person for doing your deed for the day!
So now life enjoy I’m respecting you!
‘forget your past and your future and live the day’ so do it when you feel like it and get off the road and worry no more!

a weird riddle for me

2007-01-25T23:30:00.001+03:00

Someone sent me a riddle and he said my friend challenged me to solve it and try it yourself. It was a brain teaser indeed! I left it for sometime unopened then I decided to see if I can go wild and solve it! I printed it out and grabbed a paper and a pencil and went to my room with really high hope! I thought why I can't solve it? if I focus and then I can brag everywhere about it!
well, I had all that hope and I didn't know what it was about, nor how hard it was. all I knew is that it was for Einstein's Riddle.
I got ready and read the riddle and the beginning was: "The story behind Einstein's riddle is that Albert Einstein created it in the late 1800s, and claimed that 98% of the world population couldn't solve it. I am not sure of the true origin, but I have seen this one floating around the internet, and it is a good brain exercise." and I thought ok why not? I can be from those 2%! and I thought Albert Einstein was being too proud of he has done! I think at that moment I forget who Albert Einstein was! I did! I thought him someone I can compare myself with!
and I started with a lots of maps, thoughts,...

I was doing good -so I thought- and I was filling my map! and after filling two things, I would stop! because my brain would stop working after finding out some things, so I let my brain take the rest and relax and I would in that time stare at the paper and it would look like strange words written in some strange language. but then, it became English after sometime on brain resting! and so on was my situation with this riddle! until I was nearly done and I left it because I thought something was missing! so I searched online for this riddle and I knew what I was doing this whole time trying to fit those pits, colors, drinks, ects. I found out that the riddle's question was: "who owns the fish?" and I thought how did I manage to try and solve it without knowing that! I guess my friend forgot to give me such an important clue! but it's ok! as long as I know now!
so I returned to it and I linked things quickly and got my answer! I thought I had it right! I couldn't wait, I wanted him to be online but he wasn't! but I couldn't wait for him, so I searched for the answer online and I knew it! now you must be thrilled to know if I solved it or not! let me make you wait!
now! ok maybe a little longer!
so I didn't solve it right! although I tried! but I have learned something from this experience, never compare my self with Mr. Albert Einstein for he is such a great man indeed! I'm not dumper than Albert Einstein. no, I am no such thing! I can never be! if I was then I would be then I would be a genius indeed!
if someone is dumper than Albert Einstein, then they have all my respect! they are geniuses indeed! I admire them!
I decided with a friend of mine that I am a genius if I believed that I am! and I believed that I am! so I was a genius! and I am still!
so from this riddle I haven't found that I am genius or dump! I learned no such thing about my self! I have lives with myself some years that I am able to know whether I am genius or not!
so such a riddle can make you doubt yourself, try very hard, be angry with yourself, be happy with yourself, be proud, ects.
I had so much feeling through that riddle so thanks to Mr. Albert Einstein I have been able to experience such feelings!
and after I told the friend who sent me the riddle of my answer, he said maybe you can solve it again next year! but I think I won't because I already know the answer! and I can no longer draw maps for it the same way I did! so it's an end to this riddle with me! but I had a relationship with it! Sometimes I felt it was mocking me, sometimes I felt it was trying to give some hints which I failed to notice! So thank you Einstein's riddle for this wonderful experience